Well, I made it through surgery and am now home recovering. My surgery was 12/12- I was released from the hospital on 12/15- spent the weekend in a hotel and was sent home on 12/17 after my JP tube was removed. On that day, day 5, I had lost 13 pounds. From 269 to 256. Wow! I just wonder where it all went.LOL I am now on my full liquid diet, and having some definite depression with the "loss" of the old me. I miss the food! It is hard to sit at the table with the rest of the family. Hard to get the kids to understand why they have to eat all this stuff they don't like, when Mommy doesn't eat anything. I don't feel hunger, at least not anything I recognize. When I do eat, I feel alot of pain in my pouch/G-tube area. So I don't eat as much as I probably should be. I just can not get comfortable at night, so I spend most nights lying awake wondering what on earth I was thinking!!!! Please don't ask me if I think it was worth it or if I would do it again, cuz I just don't think I would. I hosnestly knew it would be this hard, and I also really thought I could handle it, but I am scared to death of having to be on my own next week. My dad will be gone, so I won't feel like I am "recovering" anymore- just that I have to get on with my life. The nurse told me I will feel almost 100% better after I get this stupid tube out, but I wish I could just sleep until that time gets here! Jan 7th feels like a lifetime away. Well, I didn't plan on writing these things, I haven't been on this site but a week, and you guys don't even know me! And I am sure you don't want to listen to my whining! But I felt the need to voice it somewhere, I don't feel like I can say anything to my family and friends. I do know that these feelings will pass, and I don't want to listen to all the "I told you so's". ~Amy