britefuture
December 27, 2006
Dec 27, 2006
Well, I heard from my insurance last week. After the first try I was approved. I guess I have mixed emotions. I am so excited about the losing weight aspect but scared to death of the surgery aspect. I KNOW my God is in control and HE will be in charge of each and every situation so my responsibility is to TRUST HIM! As humans that sure is hard sometimes but I am going to trust him and leave it in HIS hands. I am tired of hurting constantly and not being able to walk to shop or even just look around. I want to be able to walk across the floor without getting out of breath. I want people to look at me with something other than disgust on their face. I read a profile on here once from a young lady that had gone to a work Christmas party after her having lost a good bit of weight. She said the men were talking to her and just all around her where as before they wouldn't give her the time of day. I can seriously understand that. Not that I want the attention of men as I have a wonderful precious husband that I am so madly in love with but I just would like to be noticed for something other than the fat girl. Like the young lady I spoke of previously said,"I am the same person, and they wouldn't talk to me before why now?" I am anxious to see what kind of difference there is in the way people treat me. I KNOW I will be the same person but they don't see it like that. I just don't understand that. Do you guys? I look forward to meeting many of you and having you list as my friend. I have struggled with weight all my life and had the vertical banding 22 years ago. Then I got pregnant and had a baby and gained all the weight back and that baby was born with a congenital heart defect and had a Heart Transplant 5 years ago. I have been so wrapped up in him and taking care of him that I have let myself go and now that he is better it is time to care for me. I don't mean to sound selfish at all because I LOVE my son and would do it all again. I just need to get better so I will be around for them. I look forward to chatting with and meeting many of you.
