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I reached my first major goal yesterday.  I weighed in on my home scale at 199.8!!!!  It has been 10+ years since I was back in the 100's.  Down 45 pounds.  I go in for a follow up today and see nutritionist.  Get next four week diet plan.  I can now add cheese, canned fruits and soft veggies.  Who knew those little changes would be so exciting.   Mentally, I am feeling wonderful.  I have had a few occurances of "head hunger", but they quickly pass.   This is by far the best thing I have ever done for myself. 

Haven't blogged since before my surgery on 8/16/12.  Everything went smoothly and I am feeling better than ever.  My diabetes is no longer ruling my life.  My glucose numbers are in the normal range.  I do not take naps on weekends anymore.  I can not believe the energy that I have.  I am down 40 pounds since my journey began.  I really haven't missed eating any foods.  Sometimes it is hard to get in all my protien and liquids, but I am doing ok.  I do miss the social aspect of going out to eat.  Eventually, we will be able to again.  I just have to make smart choices and plan on taking home a good portion of my meals.  I came back to work last Thursday and am getting in the swing of my routine again.  I really had doubts right up to the day before my surgery.  I was most worried about the emotional aspect.  But that has not presented a problem.    I would honestly say, 1 month out, that this has been the best decision of my life.

I am down to four days until my new rebirth.   Time is flying by.  I took my before pictures yesterday and downloaded them.  I already see a difference since when I first attended the information seminar and started nutrition on 5/4/12.  I am down 17 pounds already.  I have two days of work this week. Then one day to get everything in order.  Then D day.   I am going to the MONARCH support meeting on Monday evening.  I will get some good tips and much needed support.  Am I ready?  I think that I am.  My niece had the sleeve last Monday and has a stricture and is having a hell of a time.  I feel so bad for her.  I was hoping she would breeze through it.  At least she is managing to stay hydrated.  I purchased material to start a scrapbook.  I have heard that it is good therapy.  So I plan on putting together all of my before pictures and measurements.  That way, I have a brag journal to show off one day. 

9 days left.  Had my pre-op yesterday and everything went well.   It is getting real now.  I had a dream that my husband gave me a forkfull of tuna and pickles right after my surgery.  And I was like  "I can't eat this"  and I was trying to spit it out.  How weird.  I continue to read all that I can on the subject.  Especially the emotional end of things.  I am as ready as I am going to be.  I keep telling myself to just BREATHE.  Especially when I stress over insurance or disability paperwork or if I wake in the middle of the night and obsess about what might go wrong. It seems like we just went to the information meeting and now it is next week.  But during the process, there were things that just dragged.  

Met with Dr. Johnson today and got my date....three weeks from tomorrow.  I can't believe it.  I am excited, nervous, anxious.  But I look forward to being healthy.  Diabetes....your days are numbered.

All my paperwork is in.  I have cleared nutrition.  Now waiting to see the surgeon one week from today.  I am excited, nervous, anxious.  All probably pretty normal feelings.   I can't wait to get my date.  I feel like my life is in a holding pattern right now.  I am holding off on making appointments or plans for the month of September, hoping it will be that month.

I was released from nutrition yesterday, yeah! I should have been able to make my appointment with the surgeon, but I have to wait for paperwork to catch up.  I had my mental on 5/24 and received a form saying that I was approved, but the paperwork still isn't at the surgeon's office.  Also, my gyn faxed copies of my reports on 6/4, but the surgeon's office doesn't show they got it.   This frustrates me.  I have been very proactive in getting everything that I need to do done, but because other people have not, I have to wait.   I know that is petty.  I have been moving along at a very fast pace.  But now that I have decided to have this surgery, that is going to drastically change my life, I am anxious.     I feel like my life is in a holding pattern right now.  I need to learn more patience.  and take one day at a time.

Busy week ahead.  GVPT evaluation tonight and hopefully meet with the trainer at the YMCA later this week.  History and physical on Thursday.  Did great keeping track last week and following the guidelines they gave me at group nutrition.  I am anxious to weigh in on Thursday, as I am down over 5 pounds in the last week and a half.   Also found out that my neice has gotten the ok from her bariatric group for the  lap band.       She is just waiting on insurace approval.  I see a family cruise in the next year or so, to celebrate out successes. 

A big thank you to my new friend, Desiree.  (I refuse to call her "Perpetual Fatty"  because she is on her way to a new chapter in her life, and that name will not work)  Her motivation has inspired me.  I scheduled a PT evaluation and joined the Y.  (I even got the couple's plan, although my husband does not know it yet)     If I can even have an ounce of her enthusiasm, I am well on my way.  

Had my group nutrition class on Friday.  Spent the weekend planning menu's and shopping.  I really want to do this right.  I have my history and exam appointment scheduled for this week and I scheduled my psych. for later this month.  So far, so good.  I think that I am going to go to the Monarch support group tomorrow night.  I have "met" some great people on line and am looking forward to meeting some of them and new friends face to face.  I love to hear about others success stories as well as struggles they have overcome.  I know this is just the first steps of a lifelong journey.   I am thinking about looking into the YMCA program that my bariactric office has partnered in.   Every little thing that I can do to help me in my journey.