JannaPanda
My Story Until Now-6 Months Post Surgery
Feb 26, 2011
I've been a little reluctant to start blogging on here, but I'm 6 months out of surgery, so I think that this will be a great new tool for me to use.
I have been overweight my entire life. My mom told me when i was a baby, that she held a baby that was two days older than me, and even though we weighed the same, she said that I felt heavier. Thanks, mom!
Obesity runs on both sides of my family. Both Grandmother's had both strugged with their weight their entire life, ALL of my aunts for a few generations.
I started this process the 1st time in 2003, and realized that at the time it was something I wasn't interested in. I was 19 and just wasn't ready to make that big of a life change. I needed to live a little bit longer...I figured the option would always be there.
I could never loose weight. No matter what I did. I rode a bike, I walked, I hiked with my parents growing up and never lost weight or maintained it.
When I was 16, I was working in an office...and one of my bosses had to sit down with me to discuss my body odor with me. I was so embarassed. I cried for days and days and days. They eventually let me go, and that always stuck in my mind.
There were a few other jobs as time went on that I got disiplined for my body odor. I think in all, I have had 6 jobs that have commented to me about it, either in private or in a meeting. I couldn't help it. I showered every morning before I went to work.
When I started working at McDonalds I think that's what really killed my weight. I had access to all the food I could possibly want. Then my sister started working at Arbys, half off food!!!!!!!!!!! It was a bad time in my home life, my mom and dad were separated and food was a comfort I passed 300 pounds, I kept going up and up!
When I was 16, I was working in an office...and one of my bosses had to sit down with me to discuss my body odor with me. I was so embarassed. I cried for days and days and days. They eventually let me go, and that always stuck in my mind.
There were a few other jobs as time went on that I got disiplined for my body odor. I think in all, I have had 6 jobs that have commented to me about it, either in private or in a meeting. I couldn't help it. I showered every morning before I went to work.
In 2002, when I turned 20, I had decided to use the Depo shot as a form of birth control. and gained almost 100 pounds in 3 months. It was awful. I had passed the rechid 400 pound mark.
In 2006, I had left a job and started at another company. It was the ONLY job that I held where they asked me if I needed any special accomidations for my weight (like, a chair without arms), whatever I needed to make myself comfortable. I couldn't believe it. I finally felt comfortable in my own skin!
My now-husband and I started dating that year and I started working at a prison with my dad. The prison was THE WORST PLACE for me to be, but I had to do it to get into the government system. I did my time there (haha, little prison humor) and transferred to my current job.
We hit our highest weight together, in about August of 2009, me at 452 pounds. I had applied for gastric bypass surgery again with my now-husband's support. When I went in for my intake appointment, they weighed me, I was so shocked to see the 452 I cried. How did I get this big? How did I not notice what was happening? I felt HUGE. And the guy who was doing my intake appointment said "You have to loose 50 pounds, then we'll meet again. Your classes are cancelled and you can't have this surgery."
That was a blow to me. What? I'm TOO fat to have a life saving surgery? Well, I'll show you that I can do this....
I bought a scale and ended up starting to really try. I wanted to have the surgery, I wanted to be pretty on my wedding day...I found the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with and have children with. I was ready to take the step and do what I had to do to save my life.
We got engaged in January of 2010.
I was down to about 420 pounds and they called me to see if I was still interested.
I said "I haven't lost all the weight I need, I still have 20 pounds." and the woman I spoke with said "We can get you into the classes for April and then surgery will be probably in June, July or August. You've lost this much weight, keep it up and you can have the surgery. Your classes start April 14th."
I was shocked. I'm going to class? I'm FINALLY going to have this done?? No way.
Class was interesting. 6 weeks for an hour and a half each week. We learned so much, learned about how our bodies change, what kind of surgery works best for who....things that we needed to know to make sure this is something we wanted to do.
The Thursday after class ended, I got my surgery date: August 24th, 2010 at 7:30 in the morning. Awesome! I had a date!! I still had weight to loose, but I had it scheduled.
Three days after I got my surgery date, my mom and dad took a motorcycle vacations to Albuquerque, NM. That trip changed my life.
My dad died in Albuquerque on May 30th, 2010 with my mother and his best friends by his side. He was 51 years old.
He didn't get into a motorcycle accident. He had a pacemaker that malfunctioned, he passed out and lost oxygen to his brain for almost half an hour and was on life support for 6 days. My sister left on Tuesday and he died on Sunday. I'm thankful that I had enough time to tell him goodbye.
We got home, planned the service and held it. My sister moved back into my parents house to live with my mom because I was living with my now-husband.
With my surgery scheduled, and going through the trauma of having something tragic as that happen, I was nervous. What was going to happen to me? Would I really get married??? What if I died and I never got to be a wife, the one thing I had always wanted.
On June 13th, we decided that we were going to get married on July 1st, 2010, with a short honeymoon trip to Vegas. We asked our immediate familes to be there (his mom, dad and brother, my mom and sister) and just the parents showed up at the courthouse. We left for Vegas 4 hours after we were married.
When we got back from Vegas, there was a lot of anger from my mother and sister toward me. They didn't understand how I could move on with my life with my dad gone. I missed my dad, but I kept so busy with my own life that I had put off grieving. I didn't want to be reminded that my dad was dead.
We ended up moving into my grandfather's house that my sister had lived in before she moved back home. We fixed it up and that's where I was living when I had my surgery.
The hardest part was the not eating 3 days before hand. I did it though. Got up the morning of surgery at 4, left at about 4:45 and walked into the hospital, ready to go at 5:30.
They weighed me that morning. 402. I had lost 50 pounds all by myself. I couldn't believe it.
I told my husband goodbye and walked into the operating room at 7:30. By 7:32 I was knocked out and the last thing I remember hearing was "you'll be asleep in about 30 seconds" and I thought "Wow, this feels really, really good" and then I woke up, puking.
I looked at the clock on the wall and it said "1:13" and I thought "That's not right, it should be 11:13, what the heck is going on?". After I had woken up a little bit, they took me to my room and my husband was right by my side.
My mom and sister and grandmother showed up for about 15 minutes and then left. Then it was my husband and I and I was so drugged up, I don't remember much....all I remember is I couldn't lay in the bed, I had to sleep in a chair in my room because I was so uncomfortable. Plus, I was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo thirsty. That's all I remember.
I went home from the hospital on August 26th. In the first week, I had gotten down to 395. I was FINALLY below 400 pounds. It was a great feeling.
Like I said at the beginning. I am now 6 months out of surgery. I have not had to take insulin since then, I am able to drive my car without the steering wheel in my stomach and without the seat all the way back. I can reach my entire body when I shower. I can fit into jeans. I can buy clothes other places than just online. I can walk, even jog and feel great!!
I passed 300 pounds on Tuesday, February 22nd, two days before my 6 month anniversary from surgery.
My husband and I are planning our wedding as we speak. Our date is May 7th, 2011. We decided that we wanted to do something in honor of our love. He will always love me, and that's something I can say for sure. He loves the fact that I'm healthier and it doesn't take him pulling teeth to get me to do stuff now. He is my best friend, my best supporter and I love him.
I'm going to try and use this tool because life is so different now. I want somewhere to write where I can be supported by others (not just my husband) and hear other stories now that I have my own.
I'll write more later, gotta go run some errands!!
0 comments
I have been overweight my entire life. My mom told me when i was a baby, that she held a baby that was two days older than me, and even though we weighed the same, she said that I felt heavier. Thanks, mom!
Obesity runs on both sides of my family. Both Grandmother's had both strugged with their weight their entire life, ALL of my aunts for a few generations.
I started this process the 1st time in 2003, and realized that at the time it was something I wasn't interested in. I was 19 and just wasn't ready to make that big of a life change. I needed to live a little bit longer...I figured the option would always be there.
I could never loose weight. No matter what I did. I rode a bike, I walked, I hiked with my parents growing up and never lost weight or maintained it.
When I was 16, I was working in an office...and one of my bosses had to sit down with me to discuss my body odor with me. I was so embarassed. I cried for days and days and days. They eventually let me go, and that always stuck in my mind.
There were a few other jobs as time went on that I got disiplined for my body odor. I think in all, I have had 6 jobs that have commented to me about it, either in private or in a meeting. I couldn't help it. I showered every morning before I went to work.
When I started working at McDonalds I think that's what really killed my weight. I had access to all the food I could possibly want. Then my sister started working at Arbys, half off food!!!!!!!!!!! It was a bad time in my home life, my mom and dad were separated and food was a comfort I passed 300 pounds, I kept going up and up!
When I was 16, I was working in an office...and one of my bosses had to sit down with me to discuss my body odor with me. I was so embarassed. I cried for days and days and days. They eventually let me go, and that always stuck in my mind.
There were a few other jobs as time went on that I got disiplined for my body odor. I think in all, I have had 6 jobs that have commented to me about it, either in private or in a meeting. I couldn't help it. I showered every morning before I went to work.
In 2002, when I turned 20, I had decided to use the Depo shot as a form of birth control. and gained almost 100 pounds in 3 months. It was awful. I had passed the rechid 400 pound mark.
In 2006, I had left a job and started at another company. It was the ONLY job that I held where they asked me if I needed any special accomidations for my weight (like, a chair without arms), whatever I needed to make myself comfortable. I couldn't believe it. I finally felt comfortable in my own skin!
My now-husband and I started dating that year and I started working at a prison with my dad. The prison was THE WORST PLACE for me to be, but I had to do it to get into the government system. I did my time there (haha, little prison humor) and transferred to my current job.
We hit our highest weight together, in about August of 2009, me at 452 pounds. I had applied for gastric bypass surgery again with my now-husband's support. When I went in for my intake appointment, they weighed me, I was so shocked to see the 452 I cried. How did I get this big? How did I not notice what was happening? I felt HUGE. And the guy who was doing my intake appointment said "You have to loose 50 pounds, then we'll meet again. Your classes are cancelled and you can't have this surgery."
That was a blow to me. What? I'm TOO fat to have a life saving surgery? Well, I'll show you that I can do this....
I bought a scale and ended up starting to really try. I wanted to have the surgery, I wanted to be pretty on my wedding day...I found the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with and have children with. I was ready to take the step and do what I had to do to save my life.
We got engaged in January of 2010.
I was down to about 420 pounds and they called me to see if I was still interested.
I said "I haven't lost all the weight I need, I still have 20 pounds." and the woman I spoke with said "We can get you into the classes for April and then surgery will be probably in June, July or August. You've lost this much weight, keep it up and you can have the surgery. Your classes start April 14th."
I was shocked. I'm going to class? I'm FINALLY going to have this done?? No way.
Class was interesting. 6 weeks for an hour and a half each week. We learned so much, learned about how our bodies change, what kind of surgery works best for who....things that we needed to know to make sure this is something we wanted to do.
The Thursday after class ended, I got my surgery date: August 24th, 2010 at 7:30 in the morning. Awesome! I had a date!! I still had weight to loose, but I had it scheduled.
Three days after I got my surgery date, my mom and dad took a motorcycle vacations to Albuquerque, NM. That trip changed my life.
My dad died in Albuquerque on May 30th, 2010 with my mother and his best friends by his side. He was 51 years old.
He didn't get into a motorcycle accident. He had a pacemaker that malfunctioned, he passed out and lost oxygen to his brain for almost half an hour and was on life support for 6 days. My sister left on Tuesday and he died on Sunday. I'm thankful that I had enough time to tell him goodbye.
We got home, planned the service and held it. My sister moved back into my parents house to live with my mom because I was living with my now-husband.
With my surgery scheduled, and going through the trauma of having something tragic as that happen, I was nervous. What was going to happen to me? Would I really get married??? What if I died and I never got to be a wife, the one thing I had always wanted.
On June 13th, we decided that we were going to get married on July 1st, 2010, with a short honeymoon trip to Vegas. We asked our immediate familes to be there (his mom, dad and brother, my mom and sister) and just the parents showed up at the courthouse. We left for Vegas 4 hours after we were married.
When we got back from Vegas, there was a lot of anger from my mother and sister toward me. They didn't understand how I could move on with my life with my dad gone. I missed my dad, but I kept so busy with my own life that I had put off grieving. I didn't want to be reminded that my dad was dead.
We ended up moving into my grandfather's house that my sister had lived in before she moved back home. We fixed it up and that's where I was living when I had my surgery.
The hardest part was the not eating 3 days before hand. I did it though. Got up the morning of surgery at 4, left at about 4:45 and walked into the hospital, ready to go at 5:30.
They weighed me that morning. 402. I had lost 50 pounds all by myself. I couldn't believe it.
I told my husband goodbye and walked into the operating room at 7:30. By 7:32 I was knocked out and the last thing I remember hearing was "you'll be asleep in about 30 seconds" and I thought "Wow, this feels really, really good" and then I woke up, puking.
I looked at the clock on the wall and it said "1:13" and I thought "That's not right, it should be 11:13, what the heck is going on?". After I had woken up a little bit, they took me to my room and my husband was right by my side.
My mom and sister and grandmother showed up for about 15 minutes and then left. Then it was my husband and I and I was so drugged up, I don't remember much....all I remember is I couldn't lay in the bed, I had to sleep in a chair in my room because I was so uncomfortable. Plus, I was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo thirsty. That's all I remember.
I went home from the hospital on August 26th. In the first week, I had gotten down to 395. I was FINALLY below 400 pounds. It was a great feeling.
Like I said at the beginning. I am now 6 months out of surgery. I have not had to take insulin since then, I am able to drive my car without the steering wheel in my stomach and without the seat all the way back. I can reach my entire body when I shower. I can fit into jeans. I can buy clothes other places than just online. I can walk, even jog and feel great!!
I passed 300 pounds on Tuesday, February 22nd, two days before my 6 month anniversary from surgery.
My husband and I are planning our wedding as we speak. Our date is May 7th, 2011. We decided that we wanted to do something in honor of our love. He will always love me, and that's something I can say for sure. He loves the fact that I'm healthier and it doesn't take him pulling teeth to get me to do stuff now. He is my best friend, my best supporter and I love him.
I'm going to try and use this tool because life is so different now. I want somewhere to write where I can be supported by others (not just my husband) and hear other stories now that I have my own.
I'll write more later, gotta go run some errands!!
