jennyq88

Send Message

Block

Add Friend

Today was weigh-in day. I've taken off 7 more lbs. That makes 40 lbs in all since my initial weightloss before the surgery. I'm very happy, but it really hits home how big I had become when I lose this much and still people don't really notice. No one has said, "wow, Jenny lookitchooo!". But I've been down this road before, it'll come eventually. And this time it'll stay.

Mostly I'm happiest about how much of a change I feel physically. Shaved my legs close to effortlessly yesterday. Walking up stairs in a normal fashion without huffing and puffing. Putting on and tying my sneakers easily. Taking longer and longer walks. Each of these accomplishments is soooooo liberating.

And every day I sit down at my journal where I record medications taken, food eaten...calories...protein...thoughts. Marking it all down in order to keep up with my daily requirements. Everyday I sit down to that journal and record one further day away from my surgery. And I revel at each new day knowing that my wounds are healing and improving...my little stomach is adjusting...normal foods are on the horizon...time can't travel fast enough for me right now.

Surgery was 11 days ago and I'm making strides especially these last few days. I still need a lift out of bed with cringe making discomfort, but once that's accomplished I'm pretty good to go. I've gone on several excursions into the the real world and walk a little more each day with more stamina and less pain. All in all feeling good. Getting prettttty tired of shakes. Thankfully I'll be able to eat soft food in the next few days. I'm already plotting out what i'm gonna do for my first few almost normal meals.

My biggest challenge this past week is smells and imagery of food that bring back the same old pangs. It isn't anything I can't deal with, but I sure hope I get past "dealing with" the urges that food brings out in me. I dunno...maybe that will always be there. I should ask for some input concerning that in the forum. In a few weeks I go on vacation with my family. There will be lots of food and I'll still be on my soft diet. Means we'll sometimes go out for food too....I'm going to need some big time strength to not go a little crazy inside. 

I count each day as if it were a charm leading up steps to Normalcy. Recovery has been more brutal than any other surgery that I've experienced. But there were some complications and the surgeon said that the procedure spanned five hours. However, I come on here and read other blogs that express the same (in varying degrees) sorts of hardships post surgery. Its a comfort to read about other's experiences and it gives me a chance to peer into the future. Now that I've belly ached ('scuse the pun) I'm happy to report that each day feels a little better, but in the tiniest of increments.

I've lost about 10 lbs which was such a blessing to receive as I stepped on the scale today. As others experience, it seemed that after days of the fluid diet I should have started losing more faster. Water retention be damned, I wanted results! I DID lose 20lbs right before the surgery and was also warned that this might effect the initial weight loss. But after 8 days of pretty awful, tummy ripping pain, that 10 lb loss made me smile ear to ear.

Today I go to the surgeon for my first post op visit. I've been writing down questions and hoping that I'll get the answers I want. My family goes on vacation in a few weeks and I'm thinking he might probably sort of say no to that. This summer has been a homebound one, but I'll be okay with that answer if it comes. The idea that I have a new lease on life overshadows any missed recreational opportunities.

Whether I keep adding to this blog is an unknown, but it does help to write things out. I'm a big list maker (especially during this little adventure) and journaler. But I do sort of hope to check in because I have already experience how helpful its been for me to sort of drift into this community from time to time and absorb the journeys that others are experiencing.