MissDeb
Ignorance is bliss
Jun 25, 2008
06/25/08 6:10pm
I am a firm believer that ignorance is bliss and this was proven to me today! Here is my story of what happened today.....I was ignorantly fairly happy. Now understand that I do know that I have a weight problem----I am fat. But I really for the most part am pretty ignorant as to just how I look to the "outside" world (outside being outside of my mind).....as I would venture to say most of us are. Well, today after perusing some of the before and after photos I had decided that I wanted to take a before photo(s) of myself so that I could have a record of the changes I make after surgery which is still months and months away but anyway that's what I was going to do! I took a photo of myself and when I viewed it it was soooo horrific that an electrical shock feeling went through my body and came to rest in my stomach at which point I became very nauseated and tearful. THEN I felt as though I was going to have a panic attack--and this is the feeling I am left with at this point----panic!!!
WTF--who the heck is this old, fat woman in this photo?!?!?!? This is not how I feel on the inside or act for that matter--how did this happen?! If could have fled to the surgeon's office and demanded that he do the surgery NOW I would have shot off there in a FLASH!! But alas--I have to wait for at least, AT LEAST (which means it could be longer !!) 6 months!!!! ARRRGGGHHHH!!! So here I am--can't get that terrible vision of myself out of my mind and waiting and plotting----plotting how that when I have the RNY surgery and lose weight how that will not at all be the last of the surgerys that I will have--I plan to have everything that can possibly be nipped and tuck and lifted nipped, tucked and lifted and I'm having veneers placed on my teeth. I guess in the mean time I need to win the lottery!
I am a firm believer that ignorance is bliss and this was proven to me today! Here is my story of what happened today.....I was ignorantly fairly happy. Now understand that I do know that I have a weight problem----I am fat. But I really for the most part am pretty ignorant as to just how I look to the "outside" world (outside being outside of my mind).....as I would venture to say most of us are. Well, today after perusing some of the before and after photos I had decided that I wanted to take a before photo(s) of myself so that I could have a record of the changes I make after surgery which is still months and months away but anyway that's what I was going to do! I took a photo of myself and when I viewed it it was soooo horrific that an electrical shock feeling went through my body and came to rest in my stomach at which point I became very nauseated and tearful. THEN I felt as though I was going to have a panic attack--and this is the feeling I am left with at this point----panic!!!
WTF--who the heck is this old, fat woman in this photo?!?!?!? This is not how I feel on the inside or act for that matter--how did this happen?! If could have fled to the surgeon's office and demanded that he do the surgery NOW I would have shot off there in a FLASH!! But alas--I have to wait for at least, AT LEAST (which means it could be longer !!) 6 months!!!! ARRRGGGHHHH!!! So here I am--can't get that terrible vision of myself out of my mind and waiting and plotting----plotting how that when I have the RNY surgery and lose weight how that will not at all be the last of the surgerys that I will have--I plan to have everything that can possibly be nipped and tuck and lifted nipped, tucked and lifted and I'm having veneers placed on my teeth. I guess in the mean time I need to win the lottery!
Enrollment !!
Jun 18, 2008
Well, I'm enrolled now. My insurance requires that I complete a 6 month, medically supervised weight loss plan--so I have to do the waiting game. Six months will go by faster than it sounds! Hey that'll put me at around January/February for surgery maybe and then hopefully next spring/summer I'll be a thinner, updated, healthier me! I'm excited!
...WOOT-WOOT!!
...WOOT-WOOT!!
Information Session Appointment
Jun 17, 2008
06/12/08 Thursday
Went to information session tonight. Learned more and was ready to get signed up. Was told that I had to make an enrollment appointment. So I did for next Wednesday at 11am. I'm ready to get started NOW!
Went to information session tonight. Learned more and was ready to get signed up. Was told that I had to make an enrollment appointment. So I did for next Wednesday at 11am. I'm ready to get started NOW!
