MNMommaBear
tired out and recouperating once again...(or still?)
Aug 30, 2008
Well, its been a while since I've posted here. So, to update now I guess. About 2 weeks out from surgery, I ended up in the ER for the first time due to overwhelming anxiety attacks and a general physical feeling of CRAP. I found out my potassium was low. They changed a bunch of meds AGAIN and they put me on potassium supplements.
2 days later I passed out cold in front of my kids. Back to the ER (#2). Found out my potassium was very low. They gave me some IV and also by mouth to get me up to normal and sent me home again.
About a week later, back to the ER (#3) for severe stomach pain in the middle of the night. They thought either ulcer or gall bladder. They went with probable ulcer when the GI cocktail calmed things down. I had to follow up with my surgeon, who decided to do a scope to check for an ulcer later that week. The scope found no ulcer but some irritation and stricture so he dilated me a bit and sent me home.
Last Sunday night I started having the same stomach pain and went back to the ER (#4) again. They began the same procedure as last time while waiting for labs to come back. They then came in and said I had pancreatitis. I would have to be admitted and probably have my gall bladder out.
After spending the next 2 days with nothing to eat or drink, I had my gall bladder removed. I went home the next day and am now in a holding pattern.
Hoping things settle down for a while. This has interrupted my life too much already. I can't remember the last time I looked at my arms and didn't see bruises all over them from blood draws or IV's. My kids think I live on pills, not food, now. I just want to be normal and healthy, at this point I don't really care about the weight anymore.
If I could take it all back, I still would. I'm still NOT HAPPY about my decision to have this surgery. I hope sometime in the near future things will change and I will feel differently.
Tomorrow is another day.
2 days later I passed out cold in front of my kids. Back to the ER (#2). Found out my potassium was very low. They gave me some IV and also by mouth to get me up to normal and sent me home again.
About a week later, back to the ER (#3) for severe stomach pain in the middle of the night. They thought either ulcer or gall bladder. They went with probable ulcer when the GI cocktail calmed things down. I had to follow up with my surgeon, who decided to do a scope to check for an ulcer later that week. The scope found no ulcer but some irritation and stricture so he dilated me a bit and sent me home.
Last Sunday night I started having the same stomach pain and went back to the ER (#4) again. They began the same procedure as last time while waiting for labs to come back. They then came in and said I had pancreatitis. I would have to be admitted and probably have my gall bladder out.
After spending the next 2 days with nothing to eat or drink, I had my gall bladder removed. I went home the next day and am now in a holding pattern.
Hoping things settle down for a while. This has interrupted my life too much already. I can't remember the last time I looked at my arms and didn't see bruises all over them from blood draws or IV's. My kids think I live on pills, not food, now. I just want to be normal and healthy, at this point I don't really care about the weight anymore.
If I could take it all back, I still would. I'm still NOT HAPPY about my decision to have this surgery. I hope sometime in the near future things will change and I will feel differently.
Tomorrow is another day.
What the hell...?
Jul 15, 2008
I was so excited and so sure and nervous, of course, but so sure. The first 7 days of my new life went well. I kept remarking how it wasn't nearly as painful and scary and "life-upturning" as I thought it would be.
THEN day 8 rolled around. It was like someone flipped a light switch in my head somewhere. I literally woke up depressed and sad and wondering what the hell I had done. Every little thing in my day was a monumental mistake, worthy of an epic crying session. I think I even went to sleep bawling last night.
Today I woke up feeling the same and went to my 1 week checkup apt. My dr told me she'd seen this before, but was not sure why it happened or how to fix it. We decided it might help if I was getting better sleep, which I've not gotten a lot of in the last week, so she prescribed me Ambien. At the appointment she asked me several times what she could do for me and all I could say was to please make me go to sleep and when I wake up have everything better. How stupid.
The last 2 days have seemed like the end of the world and I know I should be looking at them like they are among the first. I really hope this goes away soon.
On a positive note, by my calculations I've lost about 15# this week. Physically, I'm mending well from surgery. Hopefully my mood will improve soon and all will be well.
THEN day 8 rolled around. It was like someone flipped a light switch in my head somewhere. I literally woke up depressed and sad and wondering what the hell I had done. Every little thing in my day was a monumental mistake, worthy of an epic crying session. I think I even went to sleep bawling last night.
Today I woke up feeling the same and went to my 1 week checkup apt. My dr told me she'd seen this before, but was not sure why it happened or how to fix it. We decided it might help if I was getting better sleep, which I've not gotten a lot of in the last week, so she prescribed me Ambien. At the appointment she asked me several times what she could do for me and all I could say was to please make me go to sleep and when I wake up have everything better. How stupid.
The last 2 days have seemed like the end of the world and I know I should be looking at them like they are among the first. I really hope this goes away soon.
On a positive note, by my calculations I've lost about 15# this week. Physically, I'm mending well from surgery. Hopefully my mood will improve soon and all will be well.
The Big Day
Jul 03, 2008
Well, Monday is the big day! I'm so excited, nervous and scared all at the same time. I have barely been able to sleep. I can't wait to start living a better life, healthier and able to keep up with my CRAZY kids! Really, to start living again - period.
