PATR55
MY STORY...NOW THAT MIGHT TAKE SOME TIME.. I AM 55 YEARS OLD AND LIVE IN EAST TENNESSEE IN THE SMOKY MOUNTAINS...A BEAUTIFUL PLACE TO LIVE. I AM MARRIED FOR THE SECOND TIME AND FOUND MY SOUL MATE IN HUBBY #2. HE IS A CHARACTER..NICKNAME TAZZ..AND THAT SORT OF SAYS IT ALL. WE RIDE OUR HARLEY HERE IN THE MOUNTAINS AROUND US AND GENERALLY HAVE A BLAST TOGETHER.. I HAVE 2 CHILDREN OF MY OWN AND HE HAS 5 SO WE HAVE A LARGE BUNCH. ALL ARE BETWEEN THE AGES OF 31 AND 37 AND ARE A REAL JOY TO US...WE ALSO HAVE 17 GRANDCHILDREN WHO WE ADORE...MOST ARE ACTIVE IN SPORTS. WE HAVE BASKETBALL PLAYERS, BASEBALL PLAYERS, AND SOCCER PLAYERS. WE ARE VERY MUCH THERE CHEERING THEM ALL ON AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE.
I HAVE NOT ALWAYS BEEN HEAVY. THIS BASICALLY STARTED WHEN I HAD A HYSTERECTOMY AT 40. ALSO GOT MY DIVORCE FROM FIRST HUSBAND THEN. LOTS OF STRESS AT THIS TIME OF MY LIFE.. I WAS A GRANDMOTHER AT AGE 37. MY DAUGHTER, STEPHANIE, GAVE ME MY FIRST GRANDCHILD WHEN SHE WAS ONLY 17.. THAT WAS TOUGH. SHE WAS SO YOUNG TO BE A MOTHER AND I WAS SAD SHE HAD GROWN UP SO QUICKLY... SO I AM ASSUMING THAT THIS ALL BEGAN AS A WAY TO DEAL WITH STRESS ... I MEAN MY JOURNEY WITH FOOD... IT WAS A COMFORT IN TIMES OF TROUBLE...A DRUG OF SORTS TO EASE PAIN I WOULD NOT DEAL WITH ANY OTHER WAY..
BUT THEN I REMARRIED AND LIFE WAS GOOD AGAIN..BUT BY NOW MY BODY WOULD CONTINUE TO GAIN EVEN IF I WATCHED EVERYTHING I ATE.. I WAS DIABETIC BY THIS TIME AND EVEN THOUGH I WAS CAREFUL WHAT I ATE..NOT A SNACK EATER...DO NOT LIKE CHIPS, SODAS, COOKIES ETC. I CONTINUED TO GAIN...A LITTLE AT FIRST BUT IT HAS ALL ADDED UP TO WHERE I NOW WEIGH 275. THAT IS UNREAL TO ME AS I FEEL I AM AN INTELLIGENT PERSON CAPABLE OF CONTROLLING MY OWN LIFE AND I DO IN ALL ASPECTS EXCEPT FOOD..I DO WELL EATING DURING THE DAY...BUT AT NIGHT I EAT FROM EVENING MEAL UNTIL I GO TO BED..I COME HOME VERY TIRED. I WORK IN A FACTORY ON A 12 HOUR SHIFT AND IT IS LATE WHEN I COOK OUR MEAL AND I EAT UNTIL I GO TO BED...I EAT MOSTLY BASICS FOR SUPPER..MEAT, STARCH, AND VEGETABLE...I DO NOT DRINK ANYTHING WITH CALORIES WITH MY MEALS OR EAT BREAD. JUST DO NOT LIKE THEM ENOUGH TO ADD CALORIES TO MY MEAL...BUT I EAT LARGE PORTIONS AND COOK WITH BUTTER SO THAT IS WHERE MY FAT COMES FROM...I EAT LOW FAT YOGURT BEFORE BEDTIME OR ON OCCASIONS I EAT ICE CREAM.. IT IS MY ONLY REAL WEAKNESS WHEN IT COMES TO DESSERTS. I CAN PASS THEM ALL UP BUT COULD EAT A BOX OF ICE CREAM AT ONE SETTING. THINK I JUST LIKE THE SOFT COMFORT FOODS..THERE IS THAT WORD AGAIN "COMFORT"...I EAT BECAUSE IT MAKES ME FEEL GOOD..
I HAVE WAY TOO MANY COMORBITIES....DIABETES, HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE, HIGH CHOLESTROL, HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE, DEGENERATIVE JOINT DISEASE IN KNEES, HIPS, AND FEET, FATTY LIVER, SLEEP APNEA...THE WHOLE LIST OF MEDICAL NECESSITIES FOR THIS SURGERY..I ALSO HAVE FIBROMYALGIA.. THAT IS THE REAL KILLER. I LIVE IN A BODY THAT IS FILLED WITH PAIN ALL THE TIME. I ESPECIALLY HAVE PAIN IN MY SHOULDERS, NECK AND COLLAR BONE AREAS..BUT I DEAL WITH IT BY REFUSING TO ACKNOWLEGE IT. BUT SOMETIMES IT IS SO INTENSE THAT I JUST HAVE TO TAKE MEDICATION WHETHER I WANT TO OR NOT. I HATE PAIN MEDS.. THEY MAKE ME FEEL WEIRD SO I AVOID THEM AS MUCH AS I CAN.
I EXPECT THE LAP BAND SURGERY AND WEIGHT LOSS TO HELP WITH A LOT OF MY HEALTH ISSUES. I AM GOING INTO THIS TO GIVE MYSELF A BETTER QUALITY OF LIFE AND TO GET OFF ALL THE MEDICATIONS I TAKE. I WATCH MY DAD SUFFER AND HE HAS LOST ALL QUALITY OF LIFE... HE CAN BARELY DO ANYTHING FOR HIMSELF AND I KNOW THAT IS MY FATE IF I DO NOT TURN IT AROUND SOON...TIME IS TICKING BY AND I WANT TO MAKE THE CHANGES WHILE I STILL CAN AND NOT ENDURE THE SAME FATE AS MY DAD.
MY LIFE, MY FATE ARE IN MY OWN HANDS. WITH THE HELP OF FRIENDS, FAMILY AND MY GOD I CAN DO THIS. THERE WILL BE MOUNTAINS IN MY WAY SOMETIMES AND I WILL STUMBLE AND FALL ON THIS PATH BUT I WILL GET BACK UP AND START OVER... I PROMISE THIS TO MYSELF..
THE JOURNEY BEGINS.........
