raysarstorm93
A long time ago, I was born to fabulous parents. I was their first child of 6 and I had a pretty happy childhood. As I entered the teen years, I was slightly overweight, but nothing unmanagable (I was 5'11" and weighed 175 lbs). In high school I played in the school orchestra (concert master), marching band (bass drum), and percussion ensemble (marimba). I wasn't popular, but I had friends and got along with most people.
I went to college on a music scholarship for 1 1/2 years until I married my husband (Ray) at the age of 19. (Ray was 6'6" and 175 lbs when we met- totally skinny, he's put on weight since then, but he looks better than ever). He is absolutely fabulous and he is the great love of my life. We have now been married 13 1/2 years and are incredibly happy.)
The first year of our marraige, I gained about 50 lbs. I continued to gain weight steadily until I was 300 lbs by the 4th year of our marraige. I was still able to get around and we were trying to start a family. A reproductive endocrinologist diagnosed me with PolyCystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) and I went through fertility treatments. Once we got into the $1000 a month treatments, we decided to pursue adoption.
Over the next 2 years, we had 4 adoptions fall through. It was heartbreaking, and I turned to food for comfort. My weight still increased, but it was much slower.
By 2005, I found myself at a cross-roads. Ray and I started to go to a personal trainer once a week. I increased to 2 times a week. When I started I was 345 lbs. Over the next year I worked very hard and lost 25 lbs.
2006 was a very big year for our family. We found out we would be adopting a 4 year old girl (Allie) from the foster care system. She had a lot of emotional, and psychological problems, but her spirit was resilient and the case workers thought we would be the perfect family for her since we didn't have children and that is just the environment she needed. We met her the 2nd week of January on a Monday. That same week, my sweet mother-in-law passed away.
The next week was a total blur. We raced up to Idaho to be with family, then back to Utah for a hearing with the Judge (for Allie's placement), and then back to Idaho for the Funeral. We got back home the night of Jan, 18th. The next day we got Allie moved into our home. It was so exciting to be a mom, but I was still mourning the loss of one of the kindest people I had ever met.
During this time I think I ate enough brownies to feed the entire armed forces. Motherhood was a vertical learning curve for me and I stuffed myself with chocolate and other sweets for comfort. Amid the chaos I decided that I needed to stop workouts with the personal trainer because my daughter's needs were more important at that time. I said to myself that I would start back up again once she had bonded to me and I could balance the needs of our family better.
By December 2006, my body was in bad shape. I was 350 lbs and growing. I decided I wanted to start walking again, but it was really difficult because I had injured my knee. By March 2007, my daughter's therapist asked me if I had ever thought about weight loss surgery (WLS). She let me know that she had done it when she was my age and it opened up new possibilities for her. She had the RNY, but told me about a new procedure called Lap-Band surgery. I told her I thought of it as a last resort, but inside my heart her words stuck with me. That night, I saw a lap-band commercial and I did loads of research on the internet during the weekend. I talked to my husband about it and he said he would support whatever I felt was right.
In April, I met my surgeon, Christina Richards, and I started meeting the requirements for the surgery. I took Ray to all the meetings. I read 2 books on lap-band surgery and another one on RNY. I felt in my heart that the lap-band surgery was the right one for me. My weight had by this time reached a whopping 359 lbs.
My paperwork was submitted to my insurance company, and they promptly lost it. The insurance company would lose parts of my paperwork a 2nd time before they finally got it together and approved me for my surgery on June 15, 2007. (HOORAY!!!)
I was so excited, and nervous, and elated, and scared. What in the world was I doing?!?!
I started looking at all the success stories and felt comforted that I was doing the right thing. By my pre-op visit, I had dropped 8 lbs to 351. I started my pre-op liquid diet and decided that no matter what, I was going to stick to it. Now I am 2 days before my surgery. As of this morning, my weight is at 337 lbs. I am amazed and excited. I'm starting to get nervous about the surgery, but at the same time I know I can do this.
I am excited about my bright future after the surgery. I am looking forward to playing with Allie and having the energy to keep up with her. I am looking forward to buying clothes from the store, instead of online because it is the only place I can buy clothes that fit. I am looking forward to going to the amusement part and being able to fit my butt in the seat (By the time I am able to do this, Allie will be old enough and tall enough to go on the rides with me. It will be a super-cool experience (Ray hates amusement rides, but doesn't mind letting me go on them)). I am looking forward to having a better life and being able to enjoy a much healthier me.
This journey is going to be very difficult, but I am worth it!
~Sarah
