RobinRN44

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Well, I left on Sunday morning for the airport to fly from Minnesota to San Antonio, Texas.  Once I got to SAT, I hopped on the LaQuinta shuttle and they drove me to the hotel where Rosie, the driver for Endobariatrics picked me up.  We then drove about 2 1/4 hours to Eagle Pass, Texas where I stayed in a hotel for the night.  Rosie told me my pickup would be at 8:15 the next morning.  BORING.  Not alot to do in Eagle Pass, plus I was alone, so I stayed in the hotel, drank my broth and watched television.  Slept ok, not great, mostly because I was so excited to get this done.

Rosie picked me up and we drove 10 minutes across the Mexico border through the very quaint town of Piedras Negras, MX.  I met Dr. Alvarez, and can I say, what a nice man.  He was very down to earth, talked to me like I was a good friend and was there to answer any and all questions I had.  Very different from US surgeons, who are focused on time.  Once we had gone through my health history, the procedure and what I should plan on happening, I went with Christina, one of Dr. Alvarez' nurses (who speaks wonderful English).  We went to get my bloodwork and chest xray done.  When I stepped out of Dr. Alvarez office into the hospital, I was at first taken aback.  The hospital is very old and the nursing staff wear the nurse hats that they used to wear in the US in the 60's and 70's.  They don't have computers and still type on typewriters, but it was clean and run well. 

I met Dr. Salinas, the anesthesiologist, and he was also so friendly and nice.  He grabbed my hand and gave me a hug and said "this is going to be so good".  I went back to my suite, and a nurse came in and started my IV.  In 10 minutes, I was out and in surgery.  I woke up a little groggy from the anesthesia and my eyes were blurry with distance vision, but I had absolutely no pain or nausea.  AMAZING!!!!!  This has never happened to me before and I'm a veteran at abdominal surgery.  Never has a doctor in the states been able to control my nausea and vomiting, much less pain.  I felt fantastic.  The nurses were in and out of my room constantly, making sure to keep up on the pain and nausea meds (which obviously worked wonders).I was up walking 6 hours after my surgery and getting out of bed and to the bathroom all by myself, because I felt so good.  Dr. Alvarez was in numerous times to check on me and he told me that he repaired my hiatal hernia (which I knew I had) and he said it was 'very large', and also that my stomach was 'very large'.  He said he used a 32f bougie, which we discussed before the surgery, and he oversewed it, which is his norm. 

The second day, they removed my IV and put a hep-lock in for a few hours to make sure I was still having my nausea controlled.  It was, so they removed it and took me for the leak test.  It went great and didn't taste bad at all.  I went back to the hospital and walked my little tushie off all day.  I had a sleeping pill that night, which worked for a whopping 5 hours, and yep, I was up in the middle of the night walking my little tushie off again.  The gas pains were there, but nothing that wasn't tolerable.

Day three, I did my discharge with Dr. Alvarez where he gave me a two week supply of medication for pain, acid and a 3 day antibiotic.  He didn't make me have to go to a pharmacy and pay for meds like some MX surgeons do, it was part of the package deal.   We discussed my post-op diet of clear liquids for one week, full liquids for two weeks, mushies for two weeks then solids.  He told me that I could lift no more than 5 pounds for one week, then I could add 5 pounds every week after that.  I did a little video about my experience with Endobariatrics (because I'm a nurse) and Rosie brought me back to San Antonio to the LaQuinta Inn.  I took a stroll to the Walmart which was about 3 blocks away from the hotel to get some broth and something to drink.  I had planned on taking the shuttle to the RiverWalk and the Alamo etc. to do a little 'site seeing' but after the 3 block walk to and from the Walmart, my body told me otherwise.  I was exhausted.  So, I stayed in the hotel. 

Day four postop, I was shuttled to the SAT airport.  I walked the airport to my gate, instead of using the skycap or wheelchair and waited for my flight.  Thank heavens that this plane was larger than the one I flew to TX on.  I actually had some room to sit in my seat.  Once in MN, I hoofed it to the parking ramp, got my car and paid a ridiculous parking fee to get out of the parking ramp.  $158 for 5 days.  UGH!  I drove an hour home.  I am now on the morning of my 7th day post-op (awake at 4am, because I'm an insomniac) and doing pretty much everything I want.  Even made a big Turkey dinner for my family yesterday.  I'm gravitating toward the Food Network, watching them cook healthy meals, and not the boxed garbage that has gotten me to where I am.  I'm so looking forward to enjoying making meals and being creative in the kitchen.

I would not hesitate to encourage others who don't have insurance, or whose insurance don't cover the VSG to go to Dr. Alvarez.  His fees are $8999 for everything and he is a great surgeon and very nice man.  I've seen some hospital bills in the US for this procedure to be $32000.00, which is insane.  I never once felt worried about being in MX and was in very qualified hands.  Dr. Alvarez has done nearly 1500 VSG's.  I'd rather go to the surgeon with the experience and credentials and Dr. Alvarez has both!!

I told my husband over the phone today.  He called to say he won't be home for another 3 days, so I figured I'd bite the bullet and spill the beans.  He was ok with it.  We have both prayed about it, and we both feel comfortable with the VSG being done.  OMG.  I can't believe the stress I have had about this.  I should have just told him in the beginning.  it would have saved me so much wasted stress. 

I love this man. 

His only concern was that "I suppose you will get skinny and want to leave me".  This I can handle

Well, my husband didn't come home this weekend and I didn't want to discuss this over the phone, so again I wait to tell him about my surgery.  I have two very busy weeks at work coming up trying to see all of my patients before I leave for two weeks vacation (surgery).  Slightly stressful, because I have to triage the most needy of them and then schedule the rest for the following two weeks when I return.

I have been trying to gather stuff together for the surgery and post-op.  I have actually felt so calm about this in the last week  that it is kind of weird.  I definately know this is the right thing to do.  Today is cleaning day for me.  My 21 year old moved home and now we have a 1 bedroom apartment in our house (mostly in the basement), but it's more stuff you know? 

I did my first youtube video.  I'm ryepma43 if you want to take a peek.  I was talking real slow and doing some stupid eye blinking thing.  I don't know what that was all about, but I think I said umm about a hundred times too.  It'll get better next time I promise. 

Bye for now...

I'm getting closer and closer and NO, I still haven't told my husband.  I'm thinking I might this weekend when he comes home from work.  I think I'm afraid he will be disappointed that I can't do it without the surgery, + the finances.  He wants to pay down all of our debt, and so do I, but I feel that this is important for me to do for me.  I don't usually do things like this without involving him, well we'll see what this weekend brings.

Fall is here, and I've been walking my 3 dogs, all Shih-tzu's.  We go for about 1 1/2 miles every day.  I haven't been doing much else in the line of exercise.  I came down with a head and chest cold last Thursday and can't seem to shake it.  My oxygen is at 95% so I'm not too concerned yet.  I'm just tired and hoping it gets better by the end of the week or I'll be in the clinic getting antibiotics, so it doesn't botch my surgery. 

I can't wait.  I've been researching foods, proteins and such, and have found that Vitamin Shoppe is my new favorite place.  My son is going into the Marines (reserves) and needs to cut a little weight too, so we're on this mission together.  He went with me yesterday and loves the place too.  They have so much to pick from and alot of their stuff they have samples you can buy instead of picking up a 5 gallon tub and hating it.  Oh Yeah makes a RTD and powder protein that is pretty good.  I liked the Chocolate, but the Vanilla was lousy.  I'm usually a Vanilla girl too.  I like the protein shakes that don't taste like there is protein in them. 

Enough for now, need a nap.  Exhausted and my Nyquil is calling my name!! 

My son just called me on his lunch break and said "Mom, would you feel better if I went with you when you have surgery?"  I said "Honey, I'm not afraid of the surgery and I don't know what you would do while I'm there".  He said "yeah, I thought I might be bored".  I asked him if he would feel better about it if he came with me and he said "Well, if you feel ok about it, I guess I'm ok about it".  He's nervous.  I wish I could ease his fears, but it really is sweet isn't it?  He's such a wonderful young man.  I'm truly blessed. 

Is it sick that I have told my 21 year old son, but not my husband?  My son said "If I were you I wouldn't tell dad until after the surgery or he'll say no".  I love my husband dearly, but I just can't tell him.

I'm getting ready to soak in a nice, long, hot, bubble bath and I look at the calendar and see I have exactly 4 weeks left before my VSG.  YAY!

I still haven't told my husband that I'm doing this.  He is a construction worker and is working out of state, coming home every other week for a day.  It just so happens that he would be scheduled to be home when I am scheduled to be flying to San Antonio TX.  He may be losing this position in the next 2 weeks and I'm hoping that he gets shifted to another job, so he won't be home when I need to fly out.  He would most likely be shifted to a much farther location and wouldn't be able to come home.  I'd love to surprise him with a SKINNY WIFE!  I don't know why I am so afraid to tell him I made the decision and am having part of it financed, except that he wants to have all of our debt paid off.  I understand and second that notion, but I am more interested in being healthy, so my health has taken first place. 

OH has really become an obsession for me.  I think it's because so many people are in the exact same place as I am, which is unusual for me.  I work with a group of nurses that are all thin.  Seriously.  ALL OF THEM ARE THIN.  I'm the fat one in the room during meetings and it makes me so self conscious.  I'm a nurse and I know better.  Again:  HOW could I have LET myself GET THIS FAT?????

Soon I will be thin, healthy and fit. 

CAN'T WAIT

I'm getting so excited, but sssooooooooooooooooooo impatient.  I received my passport, I have my airline tickets, my deposit has been paid and my financing is in order.  I've read and re-read my surgery instructions, postop diet and preop liquid diet.  Hopefully I will have it all memorized and will be able to stick to it so I don't have to worry about leaks.  I told my son I was going to Mexico to have my surgery done and he is more than a little worried.  He told his girlfriend and she thinks I'm crazy.  I've tried to assure him that I've done my research, and I'm an RN for crying out loud.  I've asked him to pray for me and for my surgeon and he kind of rolls his eyes because he doesn't do that.  I think deep down he will pray for me. 

As for me, along with my excitement and impatience, I'm starting to get a little nervous.  What if something does go wrong?  I still haven't told my husband that I have made all of my plans.  What if I have complications and die?  I believe in God and I know ultimately He makes the final decision, but I'd really like to have more time with my family you know?  Is this for vanity or for health reasons?  Here I go back to my teenage years worrying about what people will think when ultimately it doesn't matter.  What matters is that I'm alive to see my son get married and have my grandchildren.   What if......   Please pray for me.

I have asked for many signs from God that this is the right thing to do for myself and my health.  In the last few days, I am seeing Monarch Butterflies everywhere.  The significance of the butterfly is "new life", which I believe is my sign from God letting me know that I am going to have a new life with this VSG surgery. 

Well, I talked to my hubby today about how I've been feeling about myself and my body and my health and I think he gets it.  He said I should talk to the doctor, but again brought up using insurance to pay for it.  I decided that I would explain to him why I didn't want the RNY or LapBand and I think he gets that too.  Yay!!  He didn't want to move forward without praying about it (which I didn't tell him I've been already doing and feel a very calm feeling about having this done).  Slowly moving towards letting him know I've already made steps toward surgery on 10/18/10 (for example: sent for passport, got financing set up and sent deposit). 

I need to do this for me, and as much as I want my husband to be on the same page as I am, I don't know if I will be able to have the surgery in my time frame if I wait for him to get to where I'm at.  I love this man with all of my heart, but he doesn't feel what I feel.  You know what I mean????

I, like alot of you, have struggled (and I mean struggled) with my weight my whole life.  I was always the 'chubby' kid.  When I sat down I had rolls on my belly.  I used to 'suck it in' when I thought people might be looking my way.  In highschool, I was never the skinny blond girl.   

My mother and my father taught me to be independent and I learned how to take care of myself.  I was the responsible one.  I started working when I was 13 and never stopped.  I graduated from highschool and the next day I started my first full time job.  I always tried to please other people and make others happy.  This started at an early age.  I was the 'PeaceMaker' in our family.  I believe this is where my journey of obesity began.  I came last at all times.  And look where that got me.  232 pounds and 5'5". 

Today is the start of the new me.  I scheduled my VSG for October 18th, 2010.  I haven't told my husband yet, because he said I couldn't have it done unless my insurance paid for it.  My insurance will pay for the Lap Band and RNY, but not the VSG which is what I want.  So, today I am first and I am privately paying for this, no matter what my husband says. 
I AM GOING TO START PUTTING MYSELF FIRST.