sallard

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01/13/07

Well now I wait for the appeal and greivance meeting on the 17th of Jan.  I am going to call first thing The next morning to find out if I am approved or not. I'm going to be sooo upset if they deny me again. 
I put so much into being approved and then they denied me and I got a little off track and gained a few pounds so I got to get back on track here and get rid of that weight. I don't want to go get approved and then go in and the surgeon not want to do the surgery cause I gained weight.  I've been feeling sorry for myself I guess, not that, that is a very good excuse it's just the reason.  We are also still waiting to hear on the house. We had a little set back cause the credit bureaus take so long to post things. Hopefully next week when everything is posted it will work out the way it should and we will be able to move forward and start getting ready to move into our new home.  I've waited so long to have my own home and am looking forward to doing the updates on the house and remodeling.  I know I can't do to much and I have to take my time but I still enjoy doing it.  I'm slowly learning to slow down and not over do it so I don't have a flare up with my FMS.  There are so many things I want to do, that I had no problems doing 4 years ago that I can't even think about doing now.  It makes me so angry and even though I get the help from the kids and my husband it seems like they are angry cause I can't do everything and I feel like they think I'm just being lazy sometimes.  I wish that is all it was, and they knew the kind of pain I'm in.   
I did a lot of research and found a bunch of stuff to send to the Insurance company on how the WLS will could help me with the FMS, DJD, and Hyperglycemia.   What I wouldn't give to feel good again and beable to do things I use to.  Hopefully my Insurance company will see how serious I am about this and realize how much I can benefit from the WLS and approve my appeal.  Well I guess we are going to go and look at stuff for the new house and dream a little.  I enjoy the window shopping alot. And I get a little exercise too.  My husband and I might go out tonight too. 

12/29/06
I sent my Appeal letter in yesterday with a bunch of documents from my previous physician as well as a letter from my present physician. Hopefully they will see the need for me to have the WLS. I hate the waiting and not knowing. It seems I'm waiting for everything lately. Were waiting to hear when we can close on the house we want to buy, I'm waiting for the meds to kick in to see if they help with the pain or not.  I'm not really having a good day today I guess I'm kind of feeling sorry for myself. I've been kind of naughty lately and not watching what I eat and gained a few pounds and I know I can't do that if I weight more then I did when I started I won't get the surgery. I will get my self back on track. I guess I just needed a break from being good for a little bit, and I was so upset when I found out I was denied.  I am a Light Weight as they would say but I don't feel like it.  I think if I didn't feel sick all the time I wouldn't want the surgery so much. I've read in so many articles and online that WLS could help with my FMS and Pre Diabetes as well as the DJD and thats all I want. If I lose weight and look better will be a benefit but that is the least of my concerns at this point.  I just hope when I get the next letter in the mail it will say I'm approved and I can set the date for my WLS.  That will be the best present ever. I'm supose to have one of the better Insurance Companies for approvals but it just doesn't seem to be working out that way for me this time. I know I have to be patient but it is so hard.  Well I supose I have dinner cooking and I should get out that and take a look at it and make sure it's ok.

12/20/2006 

Here I am after months of preparing myself to be able to have the WLS and get denied. It isn't medically necessary my Insurance says. I am getting notes from my doctors, to ask them to please reconsider because they feel it is necessary.  It's so aggravating but I am not going to turn around and gain the weight I would have to be at in order to have the surgery with no questions asked.  If I am denied again I am going to continue to watch what I am eating and see if it helps. I hope to god they approve my appeal. Sure if I try really hard I could maybe lose some weight, but keep it off hmmm I'm not sure isn't that why most of us are here anyways. 
I was told by someone that they thought I didn't need to have the surgery because 100lbs really isn't that much and I probably won't lose it all anyways. They also said I could lose the weight on my own if I just continue to watch what I eat.  Ok for the last 6 months I have made some major changes and cut back drastically on what I eat and I lost 10lbs. Wonderful!  Hasn't most of the people that have the surgery lost weight only to gain it back and then some because there was just something missing and once they have that surgery there ok and where they should be.  I felt like they thought I was taking the easy way out.  I just wish they could walk in my shoes for a 2 weeks and know what it's like to feel like crap all the time and know that if you could just exercise or move around more would probably feel better but it hurts to even walk around a store more then a half hour.  My legs ache all the time now and there really isn't anything I can do about it but lose weigt. 
I guess a bit angry that even though they had the same surgery I'm looking at and our weights are a bit different that my reasoning is so much more wrong then theres. Heck they didn't have any health problmes but knee pain and slightly high colesterol.  Well that is nothing to play with and weight loss will help it. Never once did I ever say you don't think you could lose it yourself.  Because I knew everytime I tried to lose weight I ended up gaining the weight back and then some. Oh well lets just wait and see what happens. I will lose this weight if it kills me though. I am going to beg the insurance company to reconsider and hopefully they will, witht he documentation from my doctors. 
Merry Christmas to All!!!

Good Morning to you all!  Well I am patiently waiting the deniel from my Insurance. The Surgeon said that even though I did everything I was suppose to and I have comorbidities, they will probably deny me cause the comorbs aren't serious enough. I don't think it's fair but I guess that is life. I'm not giving up I am going to appeal if I get denied. I've had 3 other doctors tell me I would definetely benefit from the surgery. The Surgeon did say there is a chance the Insurance will approve me but not a very good one. So I just sit and wait for that letter and deal with it when it comes. It is killing me waiting though. I want to get this over with so I can start feeling better.  
When I seen my PCP this week he was able to put me on some meds to help me with my Fibromyalgia which so far I've seen a little improvement but it could be I'm just having a good spell right now too.  
It's been quite a week that is for sure. We made an offer on a another house and we are waiting to hear if it was excepted or not. We should know something next week hopefully. I hope we don't get disappointed on this one like the last one.  My husband really likes this house and I think it would be perfect for us. It does need some work but it's got alot of the more expensive updates so we won't need to worry about those, just little things.  I'm waiting for that approval though this time before I start packing cause I don't want to have to go and unpack again til we get into a new place. Well I'm going to go and look to see if I can find some info on appealing the insurance decision, and have it ready to go if I need it. Have a wonderful day.

12/03/2006
Well we signed the papers for the new house but then the guy who was selling the house decided he doesn't want to sell it. We had someone to take over our lease in our place and everything. Talk about a mess. So now we have to explain everything to the guy that was going to take our place. 
We are going to keep looking for a new home though. So hopefully we find something better and we like more. 
I have my followup with my Surgeon on Wednesday, hopefully it goes well, and when he submits my info to the Insurance they will see that I need the WLS.  I will be so disappointed if they deny me, but I will appeal for sure. I have done everything they have asked of me and then some.  Well we are going to look at houses this afternoon and I should get ready to go and get my family fed there lunch before we go. 

Well we signed the papers on our new house. We should be moving Dec 15th, so close to Christmas but I want to be in there and settled before I have my surgery if I'm approved. I'm so excited about the new house and can't wait to start decorating it and getting things comfy and set where we want it. There are some things we are going to change of course but I'm looking forward to that to, I really enjoy doing those kind of things. 
I seen my PCP today and asked some questions about my qualifications for the surgery and if he thought I had the comobidities to qualify and he said OH Yeah you definetely have the comobidities. So hopefully the insurance company will agree even with my low BMI. 
I did something yesturday that I thought I would never beable to do. I haven't had much of a relationship with my sister in the last few years because of some things that had happened between us. Well I talked to my Mom and she informed me that my sister was in the hospital. It took me a day or two but I called her yesturday and to see how she was. It wasn't so bad but then I offered to pick her up and bring her home. That where it will stop now. Cause I can't afford to be hurt nor care to be again. It was nice to see her, she is my sister and I miss her. I wish all the things that happened didn't and that we could be close but it's so hard to let things go sometimes. Maybe with time we will be ok. My husband doesn't want me getting close though. He seen the pain I was in and she tried to hurt him to and doesn't want anything to do with her. I understand why he doesn't but I'm kind of being pulled to atleast talk to her, if I'm not going to be close to her.  Well I start my parttime job tonight at Bath and Body works. I am looking forward to those discounts that is for sure. I'm a little nervous too. I haven't worked standing up for long time and had to change jobs because of the pain in my legs but I'm only working a few hours so hopefully I get thru this ok and not have any problems and make a little money. Wooooohoooo! 
Good night!

11/23/06
I went to see the Dietician for the last time Yesterday.  I lost another 3lbs. Not bad but it brings my BMI down even more.  I'm really worried they are going to deny me now.  Time will tell I guess. I got my appointment changed for my follow up with the Surgeon from the 21st of Dec to the 6th of Dec. I'm excited that if all goes well and I'm approved there is possibility I can have my surgery the end of Dec maybe begining of Jan.  I really wouldn't mind not having any big dinner for the holidays cause it will just be me, my husband and kids. They are all old enough to help out and make something special if we really want to.  My husband is being really good about me having the surgery and even came to my dietician appointment with me yesterday even though he was sick. He plans on coming with me when I go to see Dr Johnson too so hopefully that appointment will go good and he will feel like I still need the surgery. 
My last few posts have been pretty much complaining about feeling bad all the time and for the first weekend in a long time this last weekend I was feeling a little better and was out and doing things.  It's so hard to motivate yourself when your not feeling well.  I'm trying to really push myself a little so I can make sure I'm getting the exercise I need. I even went ahead and applied for a job at Bath and Body works and got it which will be good for me and I will be off my Butt. It will only be for a few hours at a time so hopefully I can handle that time and I won't be in severe pain and can make a little extra money as well. I'm kind of excited about it.  We also got our house. I have been waiting for so long for a house and finally my husband I desided now is the time. We just need to get someone to take the place we have now and fast. We are supose to move in to the new house be the 15th of Dec. Wow! Dec is going to be a busy month that is for sure. I have alot of appointments, I'll be working and having to get packed and everything ready to move. My husband will be going to New York or DC for some trainging for work and will be gone the week before we are supose to move.  That is ok though cause when he gets back he is going to have alot of work to do that is for sure. I will have everything packed and ready to go by the time he comes home and all he will have to do is get his buddies and the trailer and truck and move it all. I can't help with that. But I can do all the packing as long as I don't lift anything heavy.  We have so much to do though. I have to get my garage empty, the startings of a rummage sale is in there and there is alot of stuff in there. I desided to make my life easier and donate it all the the neighbors place to people who need stuff. I may my friends also if they want to come over and go through the stuff and pick out what they want too. Well I should get that Turkey in the oven and get em' cooking. 
Happy Turkey Day to you all!!!

11/15/06
I'm having a heck of week this week with pain and getting more frustrated by the day.  Sometimes I just want to scream.  
My boss had her surgery Monday and she is doing great. I hope I am as fortunate as she is that is for sure.  
I see the dietician next week for the last time before surgery finally and then have to wait a month to get in to see the Doctor for my evaluation. I wish I could get in sooner. 
Hopefully everything will go right and I will beable to have my surgery in Janurary. My boss was approved and a couple days later she had to start her liquid diet.  She really handled her liquid diet well and surprised the heck out of me that she didn't get crabby cause she couldn't eat real food. I'm not sure I will be as well behaved that is for sure. Well it's getting late and I really need some down time tonight so I'm going to go up to my room and crawl into bed and just take it easy.  Maybe I will feel better tomorrow.   
 

11/11/06
My boss is having her surgery on Monday and it seems like the time has just flown by for her. Here I still have a month and half left if not two months before I know if I will even be approved.  I'm so happy for her though. She has been wanting to do this for a long time but hasn't been able to follow thru until now. I know she will do great and will be amazed at the out come. 
I lost another few pounds I think and am concerned if I lose to much I'm not going to get approved for my surgery. I'm not complaining about the weightloss that is for sure.  I haven't had much of an appetite and have had a little bit of energy and I think it has a bit to do with the Zoloff. I wish the Zoloff would help get rid of the pain though.   I still don' t feel like I'm getting enough sleep.  I'm so tired all the time.  I keep thinking that if I have WL surgery it will help the pain and I won't have to worry about getting full blown diabetes.   I could probably lose the weight with out the surgery but I would probably never lose all I need to lose and I would most likly gain it all back. I don't want to keep the yoyo weight going . I want to be a normal weight and feel good. 
I'm so excited but scared for the time to come for me to have the surgery.   
My family is being pretty descent about it.  With just the  four us here and My two older kids not being home things aren't so stressful but I miss my kids soo much when there not here with me like they should be.  I think I'm really going to have a heck of a time when my two youngest are grown up and ready to move out on there own.  I'm going to really hate them not being there to take care of and share things with.  Well I'm getting a little tired and want to do some surfing. Good night.

11/03/2006
Today I went to the Urologist to see if they could do anything for leaking, and inability to empty my bladder. EMBARRASING!!! I thought only GYN's had those nasty, cold expander like devisers. Well the doctor determined I have Mixed Incontinence and put me on medication that I will probably have to take for some time till lose a bunch of weight and it gets better or I have surgery to correct it which there is no gaurantees. I was so nervous before going in and talking to him, and didn't know what to expect and ashamed that I was having problems with this particular matter.  He was a nice doctor and listened to me and I told him how I felt and he told me it was normal.  I've been dealing with this for years and if I would have known that just taking a pill could help, I would have gone in a lot sooner I think.  
I have to take pills to get my period too and well I don't care for that to much. I do it every two months for 10 days now, and the cramping is awful. I never had that bad of cramping before. I hope that is better after my surgery.  As much as would rather not get my period at all I would rather get naturally and have less pain. When I was younger I didn't have any pain nor did I have and signs I was getting it.   I hope my daughters don't have the problems I'm having and can maintain there weight so they don't need to have to go thru this. 
My next doctor appointment will be with a orthepedic, when my PCP had exrays taken of my left knee they found degeneration of the cartilage, he didn't call it arthritis but it was a long name I couldn't remember for the life of me. He also told me the only way of correcting it is by surgery.  Why now when I am so close to having my WLS.  I am hoping after seeing the orthepidic he will tell me we can wait and see what happens after my WLS.  
My PCP also increased my Zoloff to 100mg a day instead of 50mg. The Pcycotherapist they sent me to thought I should have it increased cause she thought I might have a problem with anxiety.  I'm not sure if I agree with her or not. I've been under so much stress with my kids and mother being sick and my not feeling good with the FMS and everything else.  I did ask the doctor how long I would have to take it and he said about 6 months and then we will reevaluate.  Maybe I will be ok then and not need it anymore. Hopefully in 6 months I will have had my surgery and lost a little weight and and feel a little better.  Well enough babbling I'm getting tired and should get to bed. I'm feeling pretty good tonight so hopefully tomorrow I will have a good day and I get some of the house done.  GOOD NIGHT!!!

I'm babbling again. I think this site it awesome the way they have things set up and you can just let everything out.