scurtis2007

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Ok, back on track.  Started working out and eating better thanks to my friend Angie who's inspiring me every day with her own weight loss journey.   Wishing myself some luck!

 

Back for another fill...enough said. 

Well, after 3-4 months of HELL, I finally got the guts to go get yet another unfill.  Seems like I am back to trying to find the "sweet spot" again.  It's frustrating but I'm not ready to throw in the towel.  I can't imagine life without the band nor do I think I would have been sucessful with any other surgery.  Here's hoping!

How did this happen?  I'm up to 189 --again...and not feeling so good about it.  I think it's fill time.  To be totally honest, I have been horrible and lazy over the past month.  My excuse is the same as many--the holidays!   Still though, I have not even bothered drinking water or walking--and I've drank sodas!!!   Yes, confession is good for the soul.  Time to refocus and get it together. 

several weeks ago, I thought I needed a fill.  Turns out, I didn't.  After suffering in HELL for a week, got the unfill and wow, what a difference.  The only problem is now I think it really is time for another fill.  This time, I'm going very very slow--maybe .5 cc.  Although I did lose 7lbs in a week when I was too full, it wasn't worth it--and it's dangerous.  Definitely learned a lesson with that experience. 

What a difference a month--and focusing--makes.  I have been re-dedicated to exercising every day and feeling much better.  I can't wait to see the results.  I have really even enjoyed doing the work eventhough sometimes I still try to talk myself out of doing anything. 

I get so exhausted of waiters and total strangers freaking out over how little I eat.  Now when I go out to eat I immediately tell the waiter up front that I'll beed a to go box as soon as I tell them my order.  It doesn't remedy the situation all the time, but it does help.  The other day I was walking back to my desk with a small plate of veggies & a few tiny pieces of grilled chicken.  A total stranger stopped me and said, "is that all your eating?".  Instead of just saying my normal, "oh I'm just snacking"...and left it that, I just said, "oh, I'm not hungry and I'm watching my weight".  I then get a lecture from her about how I'm too hard on myself and how the media is so negative about self image and that maybe I should not be so tough on myself.  For all she knew, I simply was  just getting a snack.  LOL.  I thought, "wow, if I had been tougher on myself years ago, might not be in the shape I am now".  I also know what you mean about always having to explain to total strangers about things simply because they heard from so and so, that you had this surgery.  Some of the time, I don't mind sharing with anyone...but that has to be MY decision.  I want to be a good example to someone that may be where I was, but still I want to keep some privacy.  There's nothing worse than ppl that you don't know asking/sharing the most intimate things.  I really don't like it when the "always been skinny" ppl get curious either...they mean well, but come on--they have no clue.   The worst question I've had is, "so, do you have tons of loose skin now?"........uh, AS IF I would love to answer that question to anyone, let alone a TOTAL STRANGER...

doing horrible lately.  Eating bad foods....drinking milk shakes.  No wonder I'm not losing!  Time to refocus.  Back to basics.

thought I would blog about absolutely nothing.  Haven't weighed in a few days but feel pretty certain that I've lost some more.  Can't wait to weigh when I get home today.

Okay, it's been quite a while since I blogged about anything.  Lately, I've really been less motivated.  That has to change.  I have two friends inspiring me to get back in gear.  My friend Julie is going thru the qualifying stage for surgery.  My friend Teresa had her surgery a few months ago and is looking great.  Both are at opposite ends of the spectrum but both remind me of where I started, and where I can be if I reset my mind.  I am so truly blessed to have had this procedure and know that without it, my life would be doomed.