shaejr

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I am now alittle over 6 weeks post.  I have been doing fine, the only problem is i have this pain on my left side that is killing me.  I did have an open wound infection that finnally closed up about 2 weeks ago and thought the pain will be gone, but seems as if it's getting worse.  So i may see my doctor on Monday.  I don't know if it's a hernia or not because it does not always hurt just when i move a certain way. 
As far as my weight loss I'm down 28lbs,  not sure of the inches haven't measured yet.  I don't see the changes, but i can tell a slight difference in my clothes.  Last weekend i put on an outfit that i haven't worn in 2 years and i wore shoes that had an heel on them.  I didn't have a camera to see how fly i looked, because my camera went out so i had to purchase a new one. I also, went out a bought a stationary bike, because i'm in Florida and if i don't get up before 6:30am it's too hot to walk or it's raining in the evening so in order for me to get my exercises in that was the cheapest way.  So i'll start that tomorrow.
I'm eating well, be to honest i think i'm eating too well nothing makes me sick, i must admit i had a cookie Friday and it didn't make me sick.  I won't tempt to find out how much, but i just wanted to see if i had any ill effects.
But for the most part i stick to what i'm suppose to eat.  I did however eat to fast last night with my fish and grits and for about 10 minutes i flet like someone was kicking me in my chest, it hurted so bad and the only thing i could do was walk.  So now i have to slow down.  I can eat shrimp and crab legs all day long but the fish i guess is too thick for me to eat like i eat the others.  I also had some pork tenderloins and they were great no problems with it.  It seems just to be the fish and chicken breast that may be too thick for me or i'm eating too fast.
I will be returning back to work on the 25th of August, if all my test comes back no change with the blood clot.  So i am ready to return alittle, but then other days all i want to do is stay in bed because i still have the pain in my chest from the clot.  So it's really one day at a time for me.

well this is my first update since surgery.  I had a lot of complications after surgery, first off, 6 days after surgery i develop an bleeding ulcer in which i was readmitted in the hospital for 4 days. I was home for a week and a half and started having pain under my breast bone area that at first thought it was gas.  After watching for signs 2 days later having problems breathing when i lay down only, I went to the ER and was readmitted for a pulm Embloi, which is a blood clot in my lung.  They are not sure when it develop, but when i was in the hopsital the first time after surgery my pulse rate never would go down so we seem to believe i had it before surgery or right after surgery.  There is no real way to tell, but just from the symptoms i was having that i thoguht was just fromt the having surgery i overlooked it.  But by the grace of God i was not too late in catching the problem and getting treated.  Thank God the blood clot was not so large that it actually block my airway and it only effected me when i laid down.  SO now i have to inject myself 2 daily and take rx for 6 months to disolve the clot.
People have asked me if i regret having surgery now and i still say no i don't even with all the complications.  One reason is this blood clot was more than likely already about to form or had already before surgery just from me being overwieght and not active.  So had i not had the surgery i would have never known.  Because i was evaluated for a blood clot a few months before the surgery and they didn't see anything, but i always had it in the back of my mind that i did have a clot all the long.  And if it wasn't for the surgery i would died from obesity related blood clots.  So now i have a chance to get rid of the clots and not having the weight that may affect me in getting them again. 
On to a positive note, I'm down 25lbs and 36 inches since surgery, even with being in the hospital for about 3 weeks of my 4 weeks recovery at this time, i have to say that this is well.  So i won't complain i'll take it.  I was hoping to be down 30 lbs, but maybe by my 6 weeks i'll be at 30 lbs. 

Well my Oh'ers I have least than 48 hours until my surgery.  I am excited not nervous or anything but ready to have the surgery behind me and on my way to a better more fulfilling life for my family and me. 
My preop appt went well on Thursday.  NO waiting, no problems with the money that they were telling me I  had to pay upfront.  Everything went smooth sailing.  I was so happy, because that was my biggest fear,  because my insurance does not cover at a 100% only 50% of the contracted rate, bu t had alreay met a $4000 deductible.. My insurance company had me afraid that they were going to ask for the half upfront, but because I had met my deductble it was not neccesary.  I was so happy.  All of the nurses and doctors that I encountered were really nice and thorough.  Sometimes I can be a terrible patient , because I've been a nurse for 16 years.  So I tend to give people a hard time when  don't see things going right.  But, I didn't have any problems at all.  I was really happy.  Even the ABG (blood gas) was not that bad, in which I had really worked myself up about that also, but it went well too.

So everything is a go for me on Tuesday.  Boy this has been a long journey and I am glad I'm at the last hurdle.  So now the race can start with the loosing weight.
Thank everyone for their encouraging words and advise.  I really needed this website to get me through this hard time and look forward to getting help to walk me through the other part of my journey.

I RECEIVED MY SURGERY DATE LAST TUESDAY FOR 06/24/08 THAT'S 2 DAYS AFTER MY REAL DOB 06/22.  THIS WILL BE THE BEST BIRTHDAY PRESENT EVER.  I'VE HAD A LONG JOURNEY AND I AM SO GLAD THAT MY LIFE IS ABOUT START IN A NEW DIRECTION AGAIN AND I'M LOOKING FORWARD IT A NEW BEGINNING. HERE ARE THE PROCESSES THAT I HAD TO GO THROUGH TO GET TO THIS POINT.   A LOT OF APPOINTMENTS CLEARENCES LABS, BUT I MADE IT.  NOW WAITING FOR THE FINAL DAY 2 WEEKS AWAY.  I WILL NOW START MY COUNT DOWN. THANKS FOR READING AND SHARING THIS HAS BEEN A GREAT SITE FOR ME.
Sleep study 03/30/08-abn.
second study 04/06/08-sleep apnea
psych consult-04/17/08-cleared for surgery
mammo-03/31/08-normal
ekg-done 03/31/08-normal-wnl
echo and doppler 04/03/08-wnl
stress test-04/4/08 and 04/07/08-wnl
labwork-done 08/30/07-abn
repeat lab-03/31/08-abnormal
cardiac clearance-04/14/08
neuro clearance-04/14/08  
pulmo clearance-04/14/08
pcp clearance-04/15/08
medical nec-04/15/08
Appt with Surgeon 05/09/08
Send for Insurance approval 05/17/08
Approved 05/23/08
SURGERY DATE 06/24/08

OK NOW IT'S TIME FOR MY PERSONAL GOALS. I PROMISE MYSELF I WOULD WAIT UNTIL I RECEIVED MY AUTHORIZATION BEFORE I PUT THEM DOWN.
1.GIVE THANKS TO GOD FOR PULLING ME THROUGH THIS TROUBLED TIME OF MY LIFE AND TO WALK WITH ME THROUGH THIS NEW JOURNEY THAT I'M ABOUT TO ENTER.
2.WALK W/O A LIMP
3.STOP TAKING MEDS
4.STOP USING CPAP MACHINE
5.ABLE TO STAND IN KITCHEN W/O HURTING
6.ABLE TO GROCERY SHOP
7.WALK THE MALL
8.SHOP FOR CLOTHES IN STORES
9.CLIMBS STAIRS IN MY HOUSE TO GO INTO MY KIDS ROOMS
10.RIDE A BIKE
11.GO STAKING WITH MY DAUGHTER
12.GO TO DISNEY WORLD(LIVE IN FLORIDA AND I'VE NEVER BEEN)
13.GO TO SEA WORLD (HAVEN'T BEEN SINCE A CHILD)
14.FIT IN A MID SIZE CAR W/O BEING CRAMPED UP AND CAN'T GET OUT
15.ABLE TO FIT SEAT BELT ON A PLANE W/O USING EXTENDERS OR     HIDING THE BELT BECAUSE I'M TOO ASHAME TO ASK FOR EXT.
16.FIT IN AUDIOTORIUM SEATS
17.SWIM AGAIN
18.GO HORSE BACK RIDING
19.FIT IN ROLLER COASTER RIDES AT THE FAIR
20.FEEL ATTRACTIVE AGAIN TO MYSELF-I STOPPED THAT ONCE I HIT 300LBS
21.GO TO A PLAYGROUND WITH KIDS AND SWING, PLAY RUN AGAIN
22.GET MY LIFE BACK -I HAVE ALLOWED OBESITY TO TAKE FROM ME
23.GO TO MY DAUGHTERS SCHOOL FIELD TRIPS
24.BE ABLE TO GO TO MY SONS GRADUATION NEXT YEAR AND LOOK BEAUTIFUL FOR HIM.
25.TAKE PICTURES AGAIN-I HATE TAKING PICTURES NOW
26.TO BE AS SMALL AS MY SISTER
27.TO BE ABLE TO FIT IN THE CHURCH SEATS-START BACK GOING TO CHURCH.
28.FIT BACK INTO MY 2 PIECE BATHING SUITE
29.FIT INTO MY CLOTHES I HAVE IN MY CLOSET
30.FIT INTO MY SHOES AGAIN
31.GO OUT DANCING IN MY HOMETOWN-I REFUSE TO BE SEEN BY CERTAIN PEOPLE IN MY HOMETOWN, BECAUSE I WAS A STICK GROWING UP AT 140LBS 5'8 SO A LOT OF THEM HAVEN'T SEEN ME THIS SIZE. 
32.WEAR A BEAUTIFUL OUTFIT TO MY 20 YEAR SCHOOL REUNION AND FEEL  SEXY
33.BE ABLE TO SIT ON THE FLOOR INDIAN STYLE
34.BE ABLE TO SIT ON A COUCH OR FLOOR W/O SOMEONE HELPING ME UP
35.NOT TO BE SO SAD. AND LOVE ME AGAIN.
36. TO HAVE SEX AGAIN IT'S BEEN 2 YEARS,
37.HAVE MY SURGERY BEFORE MY 36TH BIRTHDAY ON JUNE 22.
38.CELEBRATE BOTH BIRTHDAY'S IN JUNE.
39.COME THROUGH THIS SURGERY WITH NO COMPLICATIONS
40. GO TO MY FIRST NFL GAME GO BUCS-ALSO NYG  LOVE FOOTBALL

Well HEAR I AM AT THE END OF THIS LONG LIFE CHANGING JOURNEY.  I FOUND OUT ON SATURDAY MORNING THAT MY SURGERY WAS APPROVED, IN WHICH IT MUST HAVE WENT THROUGH ON FRIDAY.  AND OF COURSE I WAS OFF ON FRIDAY AND BETWEEN MY SURGEONS OFFICE AND INSURANCE COMPANY WE HAVE BEEN SENDING EMAIL TO EACH OTHER.  I FELT LIKE I WAS GOING TO GET APPROVED WHEN I WASN'T THERE.  SO NOW I MUST WAIT UNTIL TUESDAY TO SPEAK WITH MY SURGEON'S OFFICE TO GET A DATE FOR SURGERY.  NOW MY NEXT DELIEMA IS HOPING THAT I CAN GET A DATE FOR SURGERY BEFORE THE END OF JUNE, DUE TO THE FACT THAT MY DR DOES NOT DO SURGERIES AT THE END OF JUNE THE BEGINNING OF JULY DUE TO THE FACT THAT HOSPITAL IS A TEACHING HOSPITAL SCHOOL WILL BE CHANGING CLASSES AND EVERYTHING.  SO I'LL KEEP ALL MY FINGERS AND TOES CROSS UNTIL I SPEAK WITH SOMEONE OF TUESDAY, OH ANOTHER THING IS I WILL HAVE TO MEET ANOTHER DEDUCTIBLE IN JULY ALSO..I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS SURGERY FOR 2 YEARS NOW AND TO BE AT THE THIS POINT IS REALLY A GREAT FEELING  AND I AM FINALLY HERE I DON'T KNOW WHAT MY EMOTIONS ARE, I GUESS I WON'T KNOW UNTIL TUESDAY.  WHEN I FIRST SAW THE AUTHORIZATION ON THE COMPUTER SCREEN I WAS LIKE NO IS THIS RIGHT I JUST CHECKED 12 MIDNIGHT AND IT STATED AUTH WAS STILL PENDING. SO THEN I STARTED SCREAMING, FOLLOWED BY CALLING MY MOM AND SISTER, THEN I STARTED CRYING AND THEN MY DAUGHTER STARTED CRYING SO I HAD TO GET MYSELF TOGETHER FOR HER SO I STOPPED CRYING THEN I CALLED MY SON BECAUSE HE WASN'T HOME.  OH AND BY THE WAY MY SON BOUGHT ME THE PRETTIEST EAR RINGS FOR MY CONGRATS GIFT.  THEY ARE SO BEAUTIFUL..
I KNOW I HAVE ONE MORE HURDLE UNTIL I'M AT THE FINISH LINE BUT IT DOES FEEL GREAT TO HAVE JUMPED SO MANY HURDLES AND STILL STANDING ON MY FEET.  THAT IS A BLESSING FROM GOD.  ONLY GOD GAVE ME THE STRENGTH TO MAKE IT THIS FAR.  I KNOW I HAVE WANTED TO GIVE UP AND AT ONE POINT I DID, WHEN MY FIRST SURGEON TOLD ME HE REFUSED TO BILL MY INSURANCE THAT I WOULD HAVE TO PAY FOR SURGERY OUT OF POCKET. $23000. YEA RIGHT.
SO MY SISTER TOLD ME TO SEE THIS DR AT TAMPA GENERAL HOSPITAL  BECAUSE HER GOD SISTER HAD SURGERY WITH THEM ABOUT 2 OR 3 YEARS AGO AND SHE HAS DONE WONDERFUL.  SO HEAR I AM TODAY READY TO GO TO THE OPERATING ROOM.
MY SISTER ASK ME WHAT DATE I'M GOING TO GIVE THEM I SAID IF THEY CALL ME TOMORROW I TELLING THEM THE NEXT DAY, BUT REALISTIC I PRAY NEXT WEEK. 

WELL I HAVE WROTE A LOT TONIGHT JUST WANTED TO PUT SOME OF MY EMOTION OUT IN THE OPEN.  I HAVE SO MUCH MORE, BUT I'LL WAIT UNTIL TOMORROW BECAUSE I'M GETTING SLEEPY SINCE I'VE TAKING MY SLEEPING PILL.
LATER FOR NOW

Well I had my last visit with the surgeon on Friday 05/09/08.  That was the last step before sending folder to my insurance for approval.  Susan with my surgeon's office states my insurance company should have everything by Friday the 05/16/08.  I'm praying that Human gets that approval ASAP, because the doctors do not perform surgeries at the end of June and the first of July which would put me off until August and that would be terrible, because I am yesterday for the surgery to be done.  This has been such a long journey for me and my family.  So many ups and downs and I's ready to claim my life back.  I've missed so many special events with my daughter and have limit her to activities that she wanted to do because I'm not healthly enough to get around to take her to events, sports, concerts, trips, etc.  My son had it all during his childhood because I didn't suffer from a weight problem when he was growing up.  So we were always on some type of get away with him, always at the beach, because his birthday is in July so we planned family vacations around his birthday.  So I'm looking forward to regaining that for my daughter.  She has her list all made out of the things we must do after surgery, she may more excited than i am. 
So for anyone that may reading this blog, keep me in prayer that I cross this hurdle very soon, so i can use this tool to shape my life back into place.

shae

Well i finally received a call from my surgeon's office to schedule my consult appt.  This is last step in the process before the surgery is actually scheduled.  I'm thrilled about this, I have been so depression lately.  Just wondering it this WLS will ever happen for me.  I made a deal with God that I get my call before 04/30/08 which will be a year that my Grandmother pass, I would know this surgery is the right thing for me. Susan from Dr. Murr's office called today @ 2:10pm, she called my home number and not the cell, just so happen that i called my home phone to check my messages @ 3:30pm and was able to speak with her.  My appt is 05/09/08 a week from Friday.  I was hoping for this week, but I'm just happy to have an appt right now.  Afterwards I got so emotional started crying at work, Thank God I sit alone in my cubicle so no one could see me.  Since I seen my Psycho and Nut. on the 04/24/08 I have went into this state of depression, I think because I miss my granny so much and i wish that she was here to share this journey with me, but I know she is watching over me today just proves it.  She has always been a strong believer in God and brought her children up the same.  And she wasn't happy that I had gained so much weight, so this is her gift to me, to have a date before her DOD, I pray maybe i can have the surgery close to her birthday which is 06/15/08 and my birthday is a week after her 06/22/08.  This will a wonderful birthday gift.  So a prayer for me that i have date before then.

Well this is it for now. I am much happier now, but still a little anxious to get this last part over and get the insurance part out of the way.  I pray this will not be an obstacle and everything goes smooth sailing.

Well I passed my psych clearance and nit clearance.  I had all my paperwork done and they were really surprised that I had everything done.  So after answering a million and one questions about my relationship with food.  I passed with no problems.  I don't have to f/u before surgery, so now I the surgeon should be calling next week.  I really would like my surgery to be done by the 30th of April, but I know that not going to happen, only because it's my grandmothers death 1 year anniversary and i promised her that i will get myself back healthy, she was not happy of the weight i had gained over the years and would always tell "Girl you are fat and you better get that weight off of you"  You know old people, they say whats on there mind and don't hold anything back.  And I love her for that, because if it wasn't for her telling me that i would have never really considered doing anything about.  So I'm not only doing this for me, in a way i'm doing for her to.  I know she would be so proud of me right now.  My biggest weakness is sweets and i have all of her recipes, because she loved to cook sweets and eat them.  Even on her death bed if she had something sweet in her month her eyes would light up like a bulb.   I know she'll be watching over me doing this transition.  And i Miss her soo much.

Well one week from my appt with Spetra and I'm getting the butterflies, because I'm so ready to have this appt behind me, it will make me feel my one step closer to my surgery date.  I pray that all goes well with my appt the first time around.  I had my second sleep study done and of course I was dx with sleep apnea so I will get my machine ordered on Monday.  I see my cardiologist, pulmon, neuro and pcp on Monday. I hope to have all of my medical clearences on Monday so that Septra will not require me to do anything else.  I'm prarying for a date May of June, but must be before July 1, because my insurance deductible starts over again and I don't have $4000 for another deductible.  I am nervous about the insurance portion, but I just have to pray that everything will work itself out for the best.  I've had alot of hurdles to jump, but I'm wtill standing.  I have been tested so many times and just wanted to give up but I pull through. 

I went to a group meeting last night, it was very informative as the last meeting.  After talking with pass WL pts. each story is different, but all have the same outcome and that is better health and loving the fact this journey was for you and no one else.  I was a little disturb by one of the possible WLS that was there for a consult.  I understand that you need all the support that you can get in this journey, but his lady has allowed her husband dictate her whole life and from what she was telling me he is not at all supprtive of her doing this life change decision she has to make.  I guess that got me uoset because that is hard enough for you, you don;t need anyone that is not supportive or understanding even if they are not supoortive just be understanding that this a decision you made for you.. So either get on broad or keep your muth close.  I know I've had to tell alot of people who has found out that I was doing the sx telling me "Girl that's to dangerous, can't you do something else, I've heard alot of people dy from this sx."  My first response is I can die in my sleep or walking and talking from being overweight.  Do you really think that I just came to this decision over night this is 2 to 3 years in the making.  And yes sometimes I feel like telling them I don't have to explain myself to you, I only have to answer to myself, I owe this to my knees, feet, back, my whole body.