SOWNB
SOWNB = Starting Out With New Beginnings
My story is like most others that are posted on here. I have been overweight my entire life, but I have recently been at my highest weight ever. I look back at the days when I weight 180 and even 220 and wonder how I could have ever thought I was fat and unattractive. I've had low self esteem most of my life because of my weight., but it hasn't always been this bad. I know I am a beatiful person, who is accomplished, loved and a wonderful mother to an amazing 5 year old little girl. But, I haev those days when my weight effects every ounce of my being. I am looking forward to starting new with weight loss surgery and being the person I know I truly am.
I've been considering wls for years now. I would do a bit of research on it here and there and then one day about a year ago I said enough is enough and I am doing this. My primary care physician wasn't so supportive of my inquiries into wls, but that didn't stop me.
I was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes when I was 17 years old. I was married when I was 19, bought a house, went to college and was pregnant shortly there after. I miscarriaged early in the pregnancy and my world was turned upside down. Soon after I gotten pregnanct again and miscarried once more. I thought my life was over. I sunk into a deep depression because I felt like God was punishing me for not letting me be a mother. It was the most awful time in my life. It took a couple of years before I braved to try again, but I did and became pregnant with my daughter in 2002. In October she was born and since then my weight has been escalating. I've been managing my diabetes, but then was diagnosed with severe sleep apnea a little over a year ago. The CPAP maching I believe saved my life. OMG - i would wake up a so many times during the night. I would fall asleep at work, I would yawn, I had no energy, it was awful. I chalked it up to stress, to life, to being a working, career driven mother of a small child. One day I got desperate for sleep and went to my doctor saying I needed to do something. After my diagnosis I looked into weight loss surgery. My insulin requirement levels were escalating out of control, despite my best efforts of daily exercise and watching what I ate. I found and find myself with non esxistant energy. I have a new job now which require traveling throughout the country. I get on planes and some planes I find I need to ask for a seat belt extender. It's embarassing. I want to be free from this fat woman's body who I don't know. I know I am beatiful and special, but know I could be so much more when I can get this weight off and be more active in my husbands, my daughter's and more importantly, my own life!! I am looking forward to wls.
Dr. Mecenas has been great. I started seeing him almost a year ago....I started out really eager and on the ball, but fell short when I started gaining weight during Christmas time. My wls was scheduled for 2/5/08, but got into the mind set that during xmas time I had to eat all the "treats" because I was never going to be able to eat them again. Needless to say, that thinking gotten me in trouble. I gained 15 pounbds from August - the end of January and my suirgery was cancelled. Since then I've worked my hardest to get my weight back down and to get back on track. I know am scheduled for gastric bypass on 5/20/08. Before that I was scheduled for lap ban. After talking with the doctor and with all my medical issues we both agreed gastric would be the best...I need releif fast from my medical issues. Tomorrow I am scheduled for my esopha.....yeah, that procedure where they stick the camera down your stomache...hopefully all goes well so I can get my surgery on the 20th. I really wanted the DR. to do my surgery in May ebcause of my work. I have a lot of responsabilities and the early the better for the surgery...I am sure the poeple at his office are sick of me calling by now...lol....I've been afinatic about getting appointments, getting things done...despite it all they have been great! I'll keep ya updated on my progress!
