visions5251
Here is my story: I am female, 55 years old, 5'7", and weigh 250 lbs.
I was very slender for most of my life, I was that person who everyone said "how can you EAT all that and stay so thin"? I had a baby (1974)and 2 weeks later was in my size 9 jeans. I so very much just took it all for granted. In fact was even, shall we say, rather judgemental towards those who were over weight, not snobby, just more on the lines of "how can they let themselves get like that?"
well, as I have found out in the last 15 or so years, there is such a horrible hell to being overweight. AND nobody WANTS to be overweight, there are just so many factors involved. I have been punished well for my past judgemental attitude on this issue.
With things like never ever feeling like you look good or pretty in anything. It affects your intimacy with your partner, because altho DH still claims I am so "gorgeus", I hate for him to see me without clothes. It affects your abilty to do things that you would like to do , of course, like riding a mini train at a little park with my grandson because I can't fit in the seats! Theatre seats, airplane seats, are all very uncomfortable now and very embarrassing, so you just sort of squirm into them and hope noone notices.
There are so many things you LOSE as a result of being overweight, that people just don't understand, like something simple as crossing your legs like a lady. But most importantly, you lose your pride in your own sense of self, your dignity in many ways, and your love of life. Nothing is fun anymore, nothing is enjoyble, your mind is consumed nearly all the time with how to get rid of the weight, so there is no time for much of anything else left for your life. I remember breaking my ankle once, and my son and my husband BOTH had to carry me to the car, cause neither could lift me by themselves, to go to the dr. Scenes like that play forever over and over in your exhausted mind.
this overweight life is horrible, it's a living hell, it's depressive, it feels like I am a prisoner in my own body. I was invited to be on the show "America's Got talent" this season, I sing... Care to guess why I turned down a chance of a lifelong dream of mine, something I dearly love?? Which is to sing in front of the world? You guessed it! I don't want people to see me on TV.... FAT! Trapped in FAT! How this robs you every day......
Anyway, I had a hysterectomy at age 38, which is where it began, slowly of course at first. I remember stepping on the scales and seeing 175 lbs. I almost fainted. What I wouldn't give to see 175 lbs now! (that weight was up from my "normal" adult lifetime weight of 125-130 lbs)
I married a wonderful man in 1997, when at that time I was around 180. Not long after we were married, I almost died from bronchiatis, and was put on steriods. (the only thing they claim can save my life during these attacks) since then I have it about 1-2 times a yr and usually require hospitiliazation. steroids....what a nightmare....weight gain, weight gain, with every attack. then menopause... As I said there are so many factors that can be involved in this overweight life.
Now I weigh 250., and no matter what I do it just keeps climbing. No need to list all the diets I have tried over the years, all the exercise programs over the years, and all of the illnesses that I have developed (Iam sure my list would match all of yours on those.)
Illnesses that are a direct result of what my dr calls "severely morbid obesity"! Oh my god, what an insult those words are, no matter how true they are. Recently, my mom who has been overweight for many many years, was just diagnosed with diabetes, so I am scared.
So I have researched and researched and have decided now to do lapband surgery,Very glad to have found this forum, it's already answering so many questions, and it's great to know I am not alone in this "surgery or not" issue. .
