Nicole F.

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Its been a long long time since I wrote. Its been over a year since my surgery. So much has changed. I lost my way for a while. Had some major heartache (did you no its really good for weight loss!) then once my heart healed again... and I fell in love like never before... I gained a few pounds. 3 to be exact. But, um, that's not exactly the direction I was looking to go in!

So... I've tried to kick myself in the ass so to speak...and I'm back on OH b/c I got a lot of inspiration from this in the past. And I'm attending a support group meeting tonight. I FINALLY realized... that I can get support from all of my wonderful family & friends, but I can not get the same support that I will get from people who are "banded" like me. So I'm going... to the meeting... wish me well :)

Just wanted to write because I haven't in a while. I went to the Dr. today & got a fill. I get all worked up about that because I am allergic to the lidocaine & so I have to go through it without. Tara, my nurse (I hope that's her title, or I'll feel bad) totally ROCKS & she's just cool so she walks me through it, etc...

So basically I have to get my butt in gear, up the protein, down with the carbs & get to the gym!!!! So easily said, less easily done!

I only lost 1.5lbs in 2 weeks. I had been trying harder too- so maybe its good I got filled. I'm going to try even harder! I'm going on a cruise in 73 days! I don't have to look the best ever- I just want to be comfortable enough to wear a bathing suit. 

I'm a 16-18 now, I'm hoping to be a 14-16 by the time the cruise rolls around!!! 

Also, this year is the first year that I haven't GAINED weight during the holidays, usually I gain about 15-20 lbs. This year I lost 2lbs. Not a big accomplishment, but I lost!!! And that.... is a first. Ok, that's all I got to say right now!!!

OH YEAH!!! And I got engaged on the 23rd of December! That's a cool thing to update about!!! (duh!)

A GLORIOUS DAY! I HAVE FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY MADE IT TO 220! I ONLY HAVE 50 STINKIN' POUNDS LEFT TO MY GOAL!!! I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR OVER A MONTH TO BE 220!!! ...well...probably a lot longer than a month. But I'm just so excited! So excited that I skipped out on what I really wanted for lunch & had a salad. Good girl!!! Hooray for 220!

So when I went back to the Dr. the (awesome) nurse there told me that I should do a few journaling things when I got home that night. So I did. She wanted me to list reasons why I had lapband surgery- and reasons why I was not motivated, and reasons why I wanted to continue on my path to my goal. She gave a little tiny journal to keep & write my food intake in. This is day 3. I have a journal which I wrote a lot in for the first part of my journey...maybe this smaller one is for the rest of my journey. We also re-assessed & She thinks a better goal for me would be 170. That is disappointing & releaving at the same time. I wanted to be 145. But she's right I'll look sick & it will be nearly impossible to get there. I'll have to be so strict & so dedicated. I want to be thin, but I'm not superwoman!

This picture makes me laugh!I bought some new leggings a new top & new shoes. I wasn't sure how I felt about leggings.... so I took a picture for my friend. I look like its the first day of school!! haha. Well, I'm still not sure how I feel about leggings. But this is what I look like @ about 225. I just went back tot he Dr. and I am feeling the need to get going again, as I took a short hiatus from my weight loss journey!

I don't know what this is all about. But I lost 2 lbs. yesterday. Hooray for Halloween! I wonder if I will lose weight on Thanksgiving. If I do, I'm calling Guiness.

Halloween Party... its been a long time since I went to one of those. Good times. A little interesting getting used to this a little will do ya thing with the drinking. Can't hang like I used to!

I was right. It was too tight. I had a terrible time with anything solid except cheese. I called & they got me in within the hour (they kinda rock like that.) and I had to do something scary. I couldn't get more lydocaine cause I was still swollen from Friday. So I had to do it without anything. Tara is the nurse that did it & she was really awesome about it. I was brave. Braver than I needed to be cause it wasn't all that painful. So anyway. That's that. I'm enjoying a bowl of chili (So far... taking it slow) as I type. This is what I have to do. I eat too fast if I don't eat & do something. Its amazing what a tiny drop of water will do.
Exciting milestone today. I tried on my bridesmaids dress from a wedding a was in 4 years ago. It fit!! I am so psyched. I'm very close to my "happy" weight in college. I can't wait. It gets better everyday & I have to remain positive & remember to eat good things only!!! oh! And get my butt movin' too :)  

I got my 2nd fill the other day. I'm allergic to the lydocaine & they need to use it anyway, so I bet this is never going to be much fun.... So far I'm not having a good time with my food. I hope its not too tight!!!  BUT on the positive side I lost 2 lbs. and went past the mark I was stuck at! So that's good. I went to the gym this morning & I cleaned the apartment this weekend. I tried to stay not bored. Anyway, yay for 225! And I'm 5 lbs. away from the 1/2 way mark!

@ 229 10/10/06. I was down to 227... but I had a great weekend :) The ticker will show 227 Just got my haircut this morning! So I took another picture. I'm only down 4 more lbs. since 9/2 today is 9/20 I guess I need to get my butt to the gym! All my clothes fit perfectly now, I guess I'm a little afraid to lose more & not have any clothes... I'll have to get over that.
I hated the picture that was here. So I deleted it... but this is what I said... This is on Saturday 9/2/06 The day before my 26th birthday & the day before I've been post-op for 1 month. I'm doing great! And loving life! This is -58 lbs. from the beginning! PS- no idea what's on my shirt, maybe water? I always do that! 1 day shy of 3 weeks out of surgery! I haven't fit in these clothes in about a year. 2 days later (today) I hit the 20lb. mark. I've lost 20 lbs. since surgery. *Current Weight* 241 :) Yay! Well... today marks 27 days after surgery. Almost a month. Tomorrow will be 4 weeks... but the 3rd will be a month... weird how that works. The above picture is of me & Brian @ my friends' wedding. I loved that dress, how quickly I found it, how sexy I felt in it... just everything. I've only lost 1 more pound since I last wrote... its hard during this mushy food phase, cause I don't like very many "mushy" things... and I find myself eating potatoes & ice cream, which are two things that are NOT on the list of healthy things I should be eating... All I can do is try again tomorrow :) On a positive note... my BMI is down to like 37. something. Which is cool. I've gone down like 7 points or so since the beginning. And I'm no longer extremelly obese. I'm just obese! I never thought I'd be happy to say that!