malkee

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So I had a failed RNY eight years ago and it has taken me that long to find a new physician who is willing to do the surgery after I lost 20 lbs.  So it took me a long time to lose that amount, and the surgery is ten days away and I am still hoping to lose more.

Reading over these posts from eight years ago, I am a little amused.  I realize I am in a better place today and more emotionally prepared for the surgery.  I'm not sure about the reason for this, but one thing I think is having a surgeon who you believe is pulling for you.

I decided to leave the local hospital where it's kind of a bariatric factory and go to a smaller one, and find a surgeon who is not quite as busy as the first one was.

This has made all the difference in my outlook. The more personal approach works for me, as it always has. So if you're just contemplating doing this, my suggestion is to find a surgeon and a hospital you're really comfortable with.  And that's not always that easy.

I had a bad experience, yes, but we're hoping it won't be a repeat.  If it is, it just wasn't in the cards. Safety is all important.  So any encouraging words you have would be appreciated.  I am 58, so I'm not as young as I was the last time, but in some ways, in addition to weighing less, I'm a little healthier.  

Part of me is looking forward to it, and part of me is just wishing it were over.  Hopefully I'll be posting again with positive news soon.

 Just wanted to check in to say the doctor I saw last told me to lose 30 to 40 lbs  before surgery. At that point I had only lost eight.  

I think I've lost a little more in the last few weeks.

My next appointment is November 8.  I'm hoping to get another 10 pounds off. We will see.

 Okay I see my surgeon Friday.  On that day it will be exactly one month since my failed RNY surgery.

When I saw him a couple of weeks ago, he said I needed to lose 25 to 30 lbs to shrink my liver enough in order to try again.  

Problem is, whenever I eat (meat that is) I can't lose weight.  I solicited a number of liver shrinking diets here on OH, and none of them had meat on menu.  

So I am fasting (basically) since Friday at noon.  I just ate some cottage cheese and cucumber and sugar free jello. I had a protein shake last night.  

But I have been up all night hungry. Maybe I'll be able to sleep. Kind of a bummer since I was hoping to watch football today.   

I hope to fast all week like  I did the week before the surgery. Want to lose more weight.

 So I was thinking about how I was feeling and thought it might be a good idea to blog a bit.  

I sent both my surgeons a thank you card for a failed operation. They probably think I am crazy. I also thanked the anesthesiologist in the recovery room and he looked at me like  was nuts. Well they are right! :))
 
Today I had one protein drink a protein bar and protein food....the food makes it a lot easier but I don't know if it will make my weght go down.  I was thinking about maybe trying to go to the gym  I belong to but I feel like I'm still a little too heavy..   

I am trying to be positive but I have to find some other things to keep me busy...I thought about and focused on the operation for so long it was like there was nothing else in life.  I have to focus on not getting depressed because the surgery didn't work  out. I wasn't even sure I wanted it but I think now I do.

I also found out today that my insurance covers the DS...although my doctor said it didn't. He said that was the reason he didn't do the surgery.  Would you risk being a surgeon's first DS patient?  I think I might.  No one else in the city does them.  But maybe I will ask him.  

 So I saw my surgeon last Friday. He said I have to lose 25-30 lbs in order for them to try surgery again. This is a little daunting but I am now on day 3 of a protein diet. Yesterday I ate food..two chicken breasts...which was probably too much. Guess I should stick to the protein powder....but it's so horrible. I'm trying to drink one now. It's about half gone.  Anyway I'm trying to be upbeat. Don't know how long it will take to do this. Over the last couple of days my weight has been jumping up and down.  Kind of discouraging but to be expected I guess. One thing that's good...my knees feel a lot better and I haven't even lost that much weight. The orthopedic surgeon wasn't lying.  It's a good feeling. Just a little manic and can't sleep.

 I am starting to feel better and put things in a little perspective.  Almost feel back to normal and it's only been a week. Who knew? You could be stabbed five times in the stomach and recover so quickly?  A little levity I guess. I weighed 303 today.  Pretty big.  I am starting to think about things other than the surgery so I guess that is a good sign.  There was so much focus and emphasis on it for so long...yet I'm not sure I was truly committed. Some of the people on this site gave me some good insight as to how I was feeling.  I am anxious to see the doctor...kind of wish the appointment was tomorrow instead of Friday but the extra days will give me extra perspective and probably some more questions to ask.I would really like to lose weight on my own. Maybe I can if I put my mind to it. I've been moving around a lot lately.    A lot more  I should say.  I'm still hesitant to discuss my true feelings (relief...a little)  I feel like I'm not supposed to admit that.  Guess I didn't really want to give up a portion of my stomach. I have to think about this some more...and more seriously. Hope God will help me with that!

I am seeing my surgeon Friday. I have to make a list of questions. Any suggestions are welcome. 

 The pain has improved to the point where I might not need medication.  I am just coming out of my "surgery daze" and am trying to put things into perspective. I'm not sure what if anything I did wrong.  I find I am very grateful to the doctors who performed my surgery.  They made me very comfortable beforehand...but I feel like I need a few more questions answered about what happened and how it happened.  I am still feeling pretty confident..but know I'm going to have to go on a very serious diet very soon.

 They did the surgery but they didn't do the surgery. They opened me up but realized my liver was too large so they closed me up. I am in pain but not too terrible. I have a mixture of emotions. Don't know if I want to go through it all again. But if I do I have to go on a liver shrinking diet.. Kind of sucks..The doctor said maybe in 3 months.

 They threw me a curveball when they moved by surgery up by two days. So Tuesday is the big day. Right now it's Saturday night...Friday afternoon I visited the surgeon He says he thinks I can return to physical therapy within a week of the operation!
Posted that here on OH and at least one person thought it was a little overly optimistic  Better that than the other way.  

I don't have any doubts this is the right thing to do. I told my sister I am pissed off because I am scared. I am never scared of the dentist but I am scared of this. Scared of pain, scared of anethesia, scared of complications.  Just have to prepare to feel under the weather.

I called the surgeon's office today because the adapter on my c-pap cracked. He said not to worry too much because I can probably get another one at the hospital.

Had a beer tonight...probably my last one for at least nine months. The surgeon said it was okay. He is a really good doctor.  He does revisions for other doctors and also operates on those who are too fat for the surgery.   

As noted, he is very confident and direct. I am hoping for the best.