NJRealtorAda

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it's been 3 weeks after surgery. i lost 20LB in the first 10 days and even tough i barley eat 400 calories a day of protein only i am stuck on the same weight. i am starting to think that it was all for nothing and i doomed to be fat forever. i hate my scale and i feel down.

Wowww!!!!! it's really working! I never lost so much weight in such a short time. that's what i needed to help me deal with the pain and discomfort i feel one week after surgery. Seating at home watching the time gos by, looking at the window and wondering how long will it take me to go back on my feet. i want to go out to the world. To get dressed, put my make up on and drive my car but i am scared. i am still very weak and taking pain killers around the clock. I have mood swings but i always find a way to cheer myself up. My boyfriend is wonderful and helping. that's what friends are for.

Now it's a waiting game. looking at the clock every few minutes while sipping from my tea. Nothing to eat..but i don't even think of food. I am visualizing myself in a tight jeans and high heals. only 24 hours left. i can make it. i have to!

today i went shopping for all vitamins and protein supplements. protein powder is $40 a box. it's better be good...it's been 13 years since i bought baby's food..well they all say that in each on for us hide a baby...i do feel like i am going to re born again in a shape of skinny me. one i never knew...but for now i am thinking of tomorrow! the 24 hours prior to surgery and me being hungry like a dog since i can only have liquids all day long. and to make things worse i am # 4th on he surgery list, meaning i wont be able to eat nor drink Monday until 1:30 pm, time of surgery. i know myself to be a very unpleasant person when i am hungry...i told my boyfriend to better not piss me off that day...lol

On February 14th 2011 i will be laying on the OR bed to finally have my RNY. I am so exited and scared as well but i have hope to enter a new stage in my life. I will be starting my journy of weight lost. It's good to be here on this site where i can meet people who can really understand what i am going through.

I am going for the gastric bypass surgery next week. Please any advice and support is welcome